Fisher King Monologue
| The Fisher King by Richard LaGravenese | |
| Character: | Disabled Veteran |
| Gender: | Male |
| Age (range): | 18 - 55 |
| Style: | Comedy/Drama |
| Length: | 2 minutes |
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Disabled Veteran: Well, he's paying so he don't hafta look. Guy
goes to work eight hours a day, seven days a week. Gets his nuts so tight
in a vice that he starts to question even the very fabric of his
existence. Then one day about quitting time, boss calls him in the office
and says: "Hey, Bob, why don't you come in here and kiss my ass for me,
will ya?" Well, he says "Hell with it. I don't care what happens, I just
want to see the expression on his face as I jam this pair of scissors
into his arm" Then he thinks of me. He says, "Wait a minute, I got both
my arms, both my legs, at least I'm not begging for a living." Sure enough,
Bob's going to put those scissors down and pucker right up. Y'see, I'm
what you call kinda of a moral traffic light really. I'm like, "RED! Go
no further! Boop boop boop boop boop!..."
