Reservoir Dogs Monologue
|Reservoir Dogs by Quentin Tarantino|
|Age (range):||18 - 55|
Freddy: ...this was during the Los Angeles marijuana drought of 1986. I still had a connection. Which was insane, 'cause people couldn't get weed anyf#@kinwhere then. Anyway, I had a connection with this hippie chick up in Santa Cruz and all my friends knew it. And they'd give me a call and say, "Hey, Freddy- "Hey, DUDE, you gettin' some, you think you could get me some too?" They knew I smoked, so they'd ask me to buy a little for them when I was buying for myself. But it got to be......got to be that everytime I bought some weed, I was buyin for four or five different people. Finally I said, "F#@k this sh!t." I'm makin this b!*ch rich. She didn't have to do jack sh!t, she never even had to meet these people. I was doin' all the work.
...then that got to be a pain in the ass. People called me on the phone all the f#@kin time. I couldn't rent a f#@kin tape without six f#@king phone calls interrupting me. "Hey, when's the next time you're gettin some?" "Motherf#@ker, I'm tryin to watch 'The Lost Boys'-- when I have some, I'll let you know." And then these rinky-dink pot heads come by--there's my friends and everything, but still, y'know. I got all my sh!t laid out in sixty dollar bags. They don't want sixty dollars worth. They want ten dollars worth. Breaking it up is a major f#@kin pain in the ass. I don't even know what ten dollars looks like.
Now this was a very weird situation, 'cause I don't know if you remember back in '86, there was a major f#@kin drought. Nobody had anything. People were livin on resin and smokin the wood in their pipes for months. And this chick had a bunch, and she was beggin me to sell it. So I told her I wasn't gonna be Joe the Pot Man anymore. But I would take a little bit and sell it to my close, close, close friends. She agreed to that, and said we'd keep the same arrangement as before, ten percent and free pot for me, as long as I helped her out that weekend. She had a brick of weed she was sellin, and she didn't want to go to the buy alone...