Regina: Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. We were best
friends in middle school. (makes a face) I know right, it's soooo embarrassing.
I don't even...whatever. So then in eighth grade I started going out with
my first boyfriend Kyle, who was totally gorgeous but then he moved to
Indiana--and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like if I would blow
her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like "Why didn't you call me back?!"
and I'd be like, "Uh, why are you so obsessed with me?" So then for my
birthday party, which was an all girls pool party, I was like, "Janyce
I can't invite you because I think you're a lesbian" I mean, I couldn't
have a lesbian at my party! There were going to be girls there in their
bathing suits! I mean right, she was a lesbian! So then her mom called
my mom and started yelling at her and it was so retarded and then she
dropped out of school 'cause no one would talk to her and she came back
in the fall for high school and her hair was all cut off and she was totally
weird and now I guess she's on crack. Oh my God! I love your skirt, where
did you get it?