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Bamboozled Movie Script

Writer(s) : Spike Lee

Genres : Comedy, Drama

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				Bamboozled

				by

				Spike Lee




BLACK SCREEN

We HEAR the voice of MALCOLM X.

				MALCOLM X (V.O.)
			You've been hoodwinked.  You've
			been had.  You've been took.
			You've been led astray, run amok.
			You've been bamboozled.

His followers ROAR.

CUT TO TITLE:

"BAMBOOZLED"

CUT TO CRAWL:

WHITE LETTERS ON BLACK

WE HEAR the VOICE of PIERRE DELACROIX.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Satire.  1a.  A literary work in
			which human vice or folly is
			ridiculed or attacked scornfully.
			B.  The branch of literature that
			composes such work.  2.  Irony,
			derision or caustic wit used to
			attack or expose folly, vice or
			stupidity.

INT. APARTMENT - MORNING

WE are in the living quarters of PIERRE DELACROIX.  The
windows overlook the Brooklyn Promenade and the majestic
lower Manhattan skyline.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Bonjour, my name is Pierre Delacroix.
			I'm a television writer, also a
			showrunner, a creative person.

We see a tall figure move in and around the space.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			I'm one of those people responsible
			for what you view on your idiot box.

CLOSE ON

Monogrammed cuff sleeve - the initials P.D.

										2.


				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			The problem is not enough of you
			have been watching.

CLOSE ON

Monogrammed shirt pocket - the initials P.D.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			With the onslaught of the internet,
			video and interactive games, nine
			hundred channels to choose from and
			whatnot, our valued audience has
			dramatically eroded.

CLOSE ON

Razor cuts a path through a white foam on a black face.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			To put it in much more simple
			terms...

Delacroix YELLS.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Like rats fleeing a sinking ship.

CLOSE ON

The handsome face of Pierre Delacroix.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			People tuning out by the millions.

Delacroix turns to the CAMERA and addresses US.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Which is not good.

EXT. TENEMENT - LOWER EAST SIDE - MORNING

The tenement building is boarded up, condemned, bombed out,
but a home, a shelter nonetheless.

INT. TENEMENT - MORNING

People to our surprise live in here.  It is a commune.  The
homeless, people who have been left out, forgot about,
written off, and don't matter.  The fringes of society.

CHEEBA, a skinny Puerto Rican male, tries to wake a
slumbering body under a mass of old newspapers.

										3.


				CHEEBA
			Yo, let's get to it.  You don't
			dance, we don't eat.  Simple as that.

The mass begins to move.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			That's right.  We slow.  We blow.
			We snooze.  We lose.

INT. CNS TOWER - MORNING

MANRAY, a young African-American dread-lock male, and Cheeba
are getting set up in front of the entrance to the
CONTINENTAL NETWORK SYSTEM building.  CNS is one of the
fledgling, upstart new networks, trying to battle with ABC,
NBC, CBS, FOX, WB, and UPN.

ANGLE ON

Entrance.  Cheeba is putting the portable floor down on the
sidewalk.  Manray sits on the curb, taking the sneakers off
and putting on his tap shoes; bottle caps are on the soles
of the shoes instead of real taps.

				CHEEBA
			Good morning, ladies and gentlemen.
			I know everybody is in a hurry to
			work, ready to begin another day in
			this rat race.  But don't sleep us.
			I'm Cheeba and I introduce to you
			the world renown MANRAY, the man
			with the educated feet.

Manray takes a small bow.  A few, not many, people have
stopped to look.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			As we continue our world wind tour,
			we would like to give you a little
			somethin', somethin' before you go
			off to make that money.  I give you
			Manray.

CLOSE ON

Manray, who starts to do his thing, and when he starts doing
his thing attention must be paid.

ANGLE ON

Crowd, as Manray gets busy, people gather to watch.

ANGLE ON

										4.


Delacroix, he is about to walk into the CNS building but
stops to check out Manray.

CLOSE ON

Manray, he pounds out some intricate steps and freezes at
the end of the move.

ANGLE ON

Crowd, who applaud as Cheeba unfolds a brown shopping bag
and holds it out in front of them.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			Thank you very much but please
			don't go without giving us some
			cheddar, cheese, money.  We prefer
			two's than fews.

People are digging into their pockets.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			I would like to add that both of us
			are homeless.  Not that it means
			anything.

A WOMAN is about to dump some change in the brown paper bag.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			I said homeless.  Ladies and
			gentlemen.  Senorita, do you know
			what that means?

Cheeba looks at her and she quickly pulls out a 5-spot from
her purse and drops it into the bag.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			Muchos gracias.

Cheeba works his way over to Delacroix.

				DELACROIX
			Good morning, Cheeba.

				CHEEBA
			Good morning to you, Mr. Delapot.

				DELACROIX
			De-la-croix.

				CHEEBA
			Y'know what I mean.  Got a gig yet
			for Manray and I yet?

										5.


				DELACROIX
			Not yet.

Delacroix hands Cheeba a ten dollar bill.

				CHEEBA
			Gracias.

Delacroix moves towards the revolving doors of CNS.

				DELACROIX
			Manray, Sloan says you're too
			talented to be dancing on the street.

				MANRAY
			Well do something about it.

INT. ELEVATOR - MORNING

Delacroix is the lone person of color in the elevator.

INT. CNS - MORNING

Delacroix gets off the elevator, takes out his ID, slips it
through the scanner and enters the reception area of CNS.

				DELACROIX
			Good morning, Marie.

				MARIE
			It's not gonna be a good morning
			for you if you don't get into
			Dunwitty's staff meeting.

				DELACROIX
			What staff meeting?

				MARIE
			The staff meeting that started 30
			minutes ago.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - MORNING

Delacroix walks, or better yet, slithers into the staff
meeting that is already in progress.  TWENTY WRITERS sit
around an oval table, all are Caucasian except Delacroix,
again he's the lone person of color, the "fly in the
buttermilk."

DUNWITTY, Senior V.P. of the Entertainment Division of CNS
looks at Delacroix and waits for him to sit down before he
continues.

										6.


				DUNWITTY
			Monsieur Delacroix, this very
			important meeting commenced...

Dunwitty looks at his Rolex Chronograph - Daytona Model.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			...exactly thirty-two minutes ago.

				DUNWITTY
			I'm sorry I'm late.

				DUNWITTY
			Do you know how much information
			can be dispensed in one minute alone?

				DELACROIX
			I didn't find out about this very
			important staff meeting until...

Delacroix looks at his Jaeger-LeCoultre.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Four minutes ago.

				DUNWITTY
			So are you telling me everyone knew
			about this get-together except you?

				DELACROIX
			I wasn't told about this until
			Marie informed me as soon as I got
			off the elevator.

All eyes are on Delacroix and he feels it.

				DUNWITTY
			People, you can attempt to pull a
			Rodman like our friend Delacroix,
			but I guarantee you'll be sent
			packing just like him.

Dunwitty via remote turns off the lights and turns on an
overhead projector.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			These are the standings.  Read 'em
			and weep.  As you can plainly see
			the Continental Network System is
			languishing.

CLOSE ON

Ratings charts.

										7.


				DUNWITTY (O.S.) (CONT'D)
			Look at 'em people.  We are BOOTY,
			CA CA.  We are DOO-DOO.  Doo-doo on
			a stick, if you will.

CLOSE ON

Dunwitty.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			I do not like to be the laughing
			stock of the broadcast industry.  I
			have pride and people, you better
			start getting some too.  These
			numbers have to go up.

Dunwitty turns on the lights.  JOAN, one of the writers,
raises her hand.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			Question?

				JOAN
			So what do you want us to do?

				DUNWITTY
			What I want everyone to do is write
			some material that is FUNNY.  The
			junk you've been writing is about
			as funny as a dead baby.  It's not
			funny, it's not new.  It's not sexy.
			It, it, it...

CLOSE ON

Fish.

				FISH
			Sucks.

ANGLE ON

Conference room.

				DUNWITTY
			SUCKS.  Thank you, Fish.  This
			meeting is over but I want everyone
			to seriously think about what I
			said and how you can deliver.

People scurry out.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			Monsieur Delacroix, in my office now.

										8.


INT. HALLWAY - MORNING

The writers, beat down, come out of the conference room and
move past SLOAN HOPKINS, a highly attractive African-
American "sistuh."

Delacroix sees Sloan and holds her arm as they walk.  He
talks under his breath.

				SLOAN
			How was it?

				DELACROIX
			Why didn't you tell me about this
			staff meeting?

				SLOAN
			Nobody told me anything.

				DELACROIX
			What good are you if you don't tell
			me stuff like this?

				SLOAN
			It wasn't my fault.  If I would
			have known, I would have known.

INT. DUNWITTY'S OFFICE - MORNING

Delacroix enters his corner office, which has huge action
photos of ALI, JORDAN, GRIFFEY, TYSON, AARON and JABBAR on
his walls, it is also decorated with African art throughout.

ANGLE ON

Office.  Dunwitty looks at the floor-to-ceiling windows
overlooking mid-town Manhattan.

				DUNWITTY
			Do you know what C.P. Time is?

				DELACROIX
			C.P. Time is Colored People's Time.
			The stereotypical belief that
			Negroes are always late.  That
			Negroes have no sense of time -
			time except when it comes to music
			or dance.

They both laugh.

				DUNWITTY
			Let's sit down over there.

										9.


Dunwitty and Delacroix sit on the sofa.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			I'm sorry about my blowup but I
			have to have a whipping boy every
			meeting.

				DELACROIX
			I understand.  But again, in all
			honesty I was not informed.

				DUNWITTY
			Forget it.  I believe you're my
			most creative person I've got on
			staff.  You're hip.  You know
			what's happening.  I got some corny
			white boys and girls writing for me.

Delacroix doesn't join him in his laughter because he
doesn't know how to take that comment or where Dunwitty is
headed with it.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			I understand Black culture.  I grew
			up around black people all my life.
			If the truth be told I probably
			know "niggers" better than you,
			Monsieur Delacroix.  Please don't
			get offended by my use of the
			quote-unquote N word.  I got a
			black wife and three bi-racial
			children, so I feel I have a right
			to use that word.  I don't give a
			damn what Spike says, Tarantino is
			right.  Nigger is just a word.  If
			Dirty Ole Bastard can use it every
			other word so can I.

				DELACROIX
			I would prefer you not use that
			word in my presence.

				DUNWITTY
			NIGGER.  NIGGER.  NIGGER.  NIGGER.

Delacroix pounces on top of Dunwitty like a cat on a mouse
and gives him a quick BROOKLYN BEAT DOWN.

				DELACROIX
			Say it again.  C'mon, say it again.

CLOSE ON

Dunwitty.  He's a bloody pulp.

										  10.


CLOSE ON

Delacroix.

He straightens his tie.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Who's a nigger now?

POW.  This is a fantasy in Delacroix's mind.  We go BACK TO
REALITY.  Everything's how we left it.

				DUNWITTY
			The material you've been creating
			is too white bread.  White people
			with black faces.  The Huxtable's,
			Cosby, revolutionary.  But that's
			dead.  We can't go down that road
			again.

				DELACROIX
			I don't agree.  The Negro middle
			class does exist, and it's rich
			material for a dramatic series or
			sitcom.

				DUNWITTY
			I'm telling you it's not.

He goes to his desk, picks up Delacroix's scripts and starts
throwing them one by one against the window.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			The middle class black family moves
			into a white suburban enclave.  The
			middle class black family moves
			into a small Southern town that is
			run by the KKK.  The middle class
			single black father raises his
			teenage daughter.  The middle class
			single black father raises his
			teenage daughter.  The middle class
			single black mother raises her
			teenage son.  And so on and so
			forth.  It's too clean, too
			antiseptic...

				DELACROIX
			...to white?  I still feel all of
			my scripts would make good shows.

										  11.


				DUNWITTY
			Delacroix, wake up, brother man.
			The reason why they didn't get
			picked up was because nobody - and
			I mean NOBODY - niggers and crackers
			alike wants to see that junk.

				DELACROIX
			I've never been given a fair shot.

				DUNWITTY
			You got your head stuck up your ass
			with your Harvard education and
			your pretentious ways.  Brother
			man, I'm blacker than you.  I'm
			keepin' it real and you're frontin',
			trying to be white.

				DELACROIX
			I'm an oreo, a sell out?  Because I
			don't aspire to do HOMEBOYS FROM
			OUT OF SPACE, SECRET DIARY OF
			DESMOND PFEIFFER, A PJ's or some as
			you might put it, some "nigger"
			show?  I'm a Tom?  I'm whiter than
			white and you're blacker than black?
			Is that what you think?

				DUNWITTY
			That's exactly what I think.  I
			want you to create something that
			people want to see.  Let's be
			honest, the majority of the people
			in the country are deaf, dumb and
			blind and I'm including 35 million
			African-Americans.  You know and I
			know "niggers" set the trend, set
			the styles.  This is a golden
			opportunity now.  These idiots have
			to be led to the water.

				DELACROIX
			I'm not sure if I can deliver what
			you want.

				DUNWITTY
			You will or you'll be back at BET
			so quick you'll never know what hit
			you.  I need a mid-season
			replacement and pronto.  It will be
			on the fast track.

										  12.


				DELACROIX
			What is it you want from me?  Some
			plantation follies?  Some sitcom
			that takes place on a watermelon
			patch?  Some show that follows four
			nigger generations of junkies and
			crackheads?  You want me to go back
			to the ante bellum days?

				DUNWITTY
			Yes!  Yes!  Yes!  I want a show
			that will make headlines, that will
			have millions and millions of
			households tuned in, glued to their
			televisions every week.  I want
			advertisers dying to buy on this
			show.  I'm gonna squeeze this show
			out of you if it kills you.

EXT. TENEMENT - NIGHT

WE SEE a street lamp, and coming out of it are some wires.
WE FOLLOW the wires into a tenement building.

The residents have tapped into a street light courtesy of
CON EDISON for power.

INT. APARTMENT - NIGHT

Cheeba stands in front of the makeshift kitchen, which
includes a hot plate, and prepares a gourmet meal of a tasty
Spanish dish.  The clean apartment is furnished with stuff
people have thrown out that they picked up on the street.

				MANRAY
			I'm starvin' like Marvin.

				CHEEBA
			My world famous, famous world Arroz
			con pollo will be ready very soon.

				MANRAY
			Hurry up, I wanna watch HBO.

				CHEEBA
			Did we get our bill yet?

They both laugh.

				MANRAY
			I guess that will come with the
			rent, gas, and Con Ed bills, too.

										  13.


				CHEEBA
			Ahh, the luxuries of life.

				MANRAY
			Yo, check it.  This is good and all
			that but one day soon I want to
			have much Benjamins so I can have a
			nice crib and pay all my bills.
			You hear me.

				CHEEBA
			Chill, I'm the brains behind this
			outfit.

				MANRAY
			And I'm the feet.

				CHEEBA
			Yo, you gotta show some patience.
			You want me to snap my fingers and
			presto chango - you're an overnight
			sensation.  Son, there is no such
			thing.

				MANRAY
			I'm tired of waiting.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

He sits in front of a large flat-screen television, watching
the Yankee game and eating his takeout Chinese food.  On top
of the monitor, he has attached a sign that reads "FEED THE
IDIOT BOX."

INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT - NIGHT

She sits in front of her television, hand on remote, flipping
channels and eating takeout Chinese food.

INT. CHEEBA AND MANRAY'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

They both are devouring the chicken with rice, as they watch
bootleg HBO.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

Delacroix sits at his desk, a ream of white bond paper in
front of him, a box of number-two pencils and an electric
pencil sharpener.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			I was never good at performing
			under the gun.

										  14.


CLOSE

Pencil after pencil gets inserted and sharpened to a knife
like point.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Well, this wasn't a gun, it was a
			bazooka and it was pressed dead
			blank right against my dome.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix, staring at the blank ream of paper.  It is very
intimidating.

CLOSE ON

Monitor.  Bernie Williams is at the plate for the New York
Yankees.

CLOSE ON

Sign atop monitor.  Again, it reads "FEED THE IDIOT BOX."

INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT

She too is blank.  A screen saver bobs and weaves on her
laptop.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT

Delacroix grabs a pencil and put it to paper.

CLOSE ON

Paper.  He doodles.

INT. TENEMENT BUILDING - NIGHT

Manray screws out the bare light bulb which is the sole
source of illumination and lays down onto his mattress on
the floor.

INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT

Sloan closes her laptop and jumps into her bed.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT

Delacroix is already in the bed, the lights are out.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix, who's wide awake.

										  15.


INT. TENEMENT BUILDING - NIGHT

Manray and Cheeba are both sound asleep.

CLOSE ON

Cheeba, he has a sheet pulled over his head.

CLOSE ON

Manray, who's sawing logs, snoring loudly.

OFF-SCREEN, WE HEAR A RUCKUS, A BIG COMMOTION.  VOICES
yelling.  Police sirens, cars and trucks.

ANGLE ON

Apartment.  Cheeba and Manray run to the window and look out.

THEIR POV

The street is filled with police cars, vans and wagons.
Helicopters hover overhead with their searchlights on the
building.

				CHEEBA
			Oh snap!  It's a raid!

Cheeba and Manray jump into their cloths.

EXT. TENEMENT BUILDING - NIGHT

Cops in riot gear storm into the tenement.  A police chief
barks over a speaker system.

				POLICE CHIEF
			Please evacuate this building.  All
			of you are illegal residents of
			this condemned building.  Please
			leave immediately, by order of the
			Mayor of New York City, Rudolph
			Giuliani.

INT. TENEMENT BUILDING - NIGHT

Stairwell.  It's bedlam.  The hundreds of SQUATTERS who have
been living here all making a bad dash trying to flee the
NYPD as they "bumrush the show."

ANGLE ON

Floor.  Cheeba and Manray try to push against the crowd.

										  16.


				CHEEBA
			Not this way.  Out through the fire
			escape.

The COPS are running up the staircase.  People try to escape
with as many of their belongings that they can hold.

				MANRAY
			My tap shoes.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT

				DELACROIX
			EUREKA!!

He jumps out of bed.

INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT

				SLOAN
			Oh my God!!!

She too jumps out of bed.

EXT. TENEMENT BUILDING

It is a MADHOUSE, BEDLAM.  It's PANDEMONIUM.  The Squatters
are being seized as soon as they come out of the tenement.
Searchlights go back and forth, as the cops make their
arrests and fill the "Paddy" wagons.

ANGLE ON

Street.  The Squatters are like ROACHES in a dark kitchen at
night, scrambling as the lights turn on.  Do you remember
those old "RAID" commercials.  "Let's scram, IT'S RAID!!!"

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

The phone rings.

CUT TO SPLIT SCREEN

CU OF DELACROIX AND SLOAN

Delacroix picks it up.  They yell in unison.

				DELACROIX
			Manray!

				SLOAN
			Manray!

										  17.


				DELACROIX
			How did you know?

				SLOAN
			It hit me like a ton of bricks.

				DELACROIX
			How can this be?  You and me at the
			same time, the exact same thought.
			It's scary.

				SLOAN
			The idea was out there in the
			universe.  Now what?

INT. TENEMENT BUILDING - NIGHT

Cheeba and Manray run down the fire escape and just elude a
group of cops.

ANGLE ON

Fence.  They lay still as the Fuzz run past them.

				MANRAY
			We ran out without my shoes and the
			floor.  I gotta get my stuff.  What
			about our savings?

				CHEEBA
			Are you crazy?  The joint is
			crawling with cops now.  You wanna
			go to Rikers?  Go to the hoosegow?

Manray looks at his friend, he knows he is right, at least
this time.

EXT. CNS BUILDING - EARLY MORNING

Delacroix and Sloan sip hot coffee as they stand in front of
their office building.

				DELACROIX
			Manray was under our nose the whole
			time.

				SLOAN
			Do you know how you will use him?

				DELACROIX
			Not yet, but this thing will never
			get made.

										  18.


				SLOAN
			You lost me.

				DELACROIX
			Dunwitty wants a Coon show.  And
			that's what I'm going to give him,
			it's going to be so racist, so
			negative, he won't have the balls
			to put it on the air.  Hence I'll
			prove my point.

				SLOAN
			What point is that?

				DELACROIX
			The point being that him, the
			networks don't want Black people on
			television unless they are buffoons.

				SLOAN
			Sounds risky to me.

				DELACROIX
			You getting cold feet?

				SLOAN
			I'm in till the end.

				DELACROIX
			Good.  I'm going to need your
			support.

				SLOAN
			Can't you just quit?  Walk away?

				DELACROIX
			And lose out on my money?  The only
			way I get paid is if I get fired.
			And that's what I intend to do.

EXT. CNS BUILDING - NEW DAY

It is pouring rain and Delacroix and Sloan huddle under an
umbrella.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Everything was going according to
			plan.  I was working on the outline.
			Dunwitty was off my back for now.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix.

										  19.


				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			But there was a catch.  A big catch.

CLOSE ON

Sloan.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Manray and Cheeba were nowhere to
			be found.

EXT. GRAND CENTRAL STATION - DAY

Manray and Cheeba are soaking wet.  They stand together in a
doorway, trying to stay out of the elements.

ANGLE ON

Street.  They run in the downpour.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			It was like they had disappeared
			off the face of the earth.

CLOSE ON

Cheeba.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			I had no contact numbers, no
			address, no beeper.

CLOSE ON

Manray.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			No nuthin', no clues...

EXT. CNS BUILDING - NEXT MORNING

It is a sunny and pleasant morning.  Again, Sloan and
Delacroix hold vigil.

				SLOAN
			Maybe something happened to them.
			Maybe they're lying in an alley
			bleed to death.

				DELACROIX
			Manray better not be bleeding to
			death.  I need him.  After we're
			done he can do whatever he wants to
			do, until then, he's ours.

										  20.


				SLOAN
			You're beginning to sound like
			Dunwitty.

EXT. TENEMENT BUILDING - MORNING

Manray and Cheeba stand across the street from their former
residence.  All of the doors and windows have been boarded
up and two cops stand watch.  They both look defeated, dirty
and hungry.

INT. CNS LOBBY - NEXT DAY

Sloan gets off the elevator and sees a skirmish.  TWO
SECURITY GUARDS are trying to escort Manray and Cheeba out
of the building.

				CHEEBA
			His name is Delapoint.

				SECURITY GUARD #1
			WE have no one by that name.

				CHEEBA
			Delapot.  Dela-something.

				SECURITY GUARD #2
			De La Soul ain't here either.
			Let's go.  Out.  Off the premises.

Manray turns around and sees Sloan.

				MANRAY
			Sloan!  She knows us.

The security guard stops.

				SLOAN
			It's alright.  They are associates
			of Mr. Delacroix.

				SECURITY GUARD #1
			Sorry, Ms. Hopkins.  They both
			walked in off the street without an
			appointment.

				SECURITY GUARD #2
			Do you need an escort?

				SLOAN
			That won't be needed.

										  21.


INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - DAY

He sits in front of his TV and watches a tape of the old
"Amos 'n' Andy" show.  Sloan leads Manray and Cheeba in.

				DELACROIX
			Eureka!  Where've you been?

He hugs them both.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Sloan and I have been looking all
			over for you.

				CHEEBA
			You'd take no offense if we called
			you DeLa for short?

				DELACROIX
			No offense.

				CHEEBA
			Manray needs a job.

Delacroix smiles at Sloan.

				MANRAY
			We got evicted from our home.
			We've both been on the streets for
			the last week.

				CHEEBA
			We was coming to see you.

				MANRAY
			If it's not too much trouble could
			you order us some food?

				CHEEBA
			We're starving.

				DELACROIX
			I apologize.  What would you like
			to eat?  Anything you want.

TIME CUT

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - DAY

A feast of McDonald's is taking place.  Cheeba and Manray
are stuffing Big Macs, Fish Deluxes and large french fries
into their mouths.  They were famished.

										  22.


				DELACROIX
			I have this concept for a TV pilot.
			There's no guarantee it will get
			made but regardless, you'll still
			make some money.

				CHEEBA
			How much?

				DELACROIX
			First things first.  I have to know
			if Manray is up for this.

				MANRAY
			What do I have to do?

				DELACROIX
			Some tap dancing, some singing.

				MANRAY
			Where do I sign?

				CHEEBA
			What kind of show is this gonna be?

				DELACROIX
			Different.

				MANRAY
			How different?

				DELACROIX
			Trust me.  Of course I still have
			to pitch it to my boss, but we'll
			have an answer one way or the other.

				MANRAY
			DeLa, I'm aboard.  As long as I get
			to hoof and get paid too!!!

				DELACROIX
			That's right.  Money turns the wheel.

				CHEEBA
			What about in the mean time?  Not
			the in between time?

				DELACROIX
			You'll both get an advance and you
			can stay with me.

				MANRAY
			Bet.

										  23.


				DELACROIX
			I would like to change your name.

				MANRAY
			To what?

				DELACROIX
			You're now Mantan.

				MANRAY
			Mantan?  I don't even care as long
			as I'm dancing.  Which reminds me,
			I need some new kicks.

EXT. BROADWAY - DAY

Manray holds two Capezio shopping bags of shoes as he walks
next to Sloan.

				MANRAY
			I never had a really real pair
			before.

				SLOAN
			You've never had any formal
			training, either?

				MANRAY
			Not a class, not a thing, just
			picked stuff up by myself.

				SLOAN
			I wish I had your natural talent.
			God only makes that visit once in a
			while.

				MANRAY
			You sing and dance?

				SLOAN
			A little.  I just graduated from
			NYU film school.  Cinema studies.

				MANRAY
			So what's up with you and DeLa?

				SLOAN
			What do you mean?

				MANRAY
			Are you and him kicking it?
			Knocking boots.
			Y'knowwhatI'mtalkin'bout.

										  24.


				SLOAN
			No, we're not knocking boots.  I
			got this internship while I still
			was at NYU, DeLa was impressed with
			my get up and go and hired me to be
			his assistant.

				MANRAY
			I'm sure that was the only thing he
			was impressed with.  You look
			beautiful like that.

				SLOAN
			If that was suppose to be a
			compliment, I thank you.

				MANRAY
			You're welcome.  You shouldn't give
			up on performing.

				SLOAN
			Why do you say that?  You've never
			seen me.

				MANRAY
			I think that would probably make
			you the happiest.  When I'm hoofing,
			I mean really doing my thing,
			hitting it, nothing compares to
			that feeling in the world.

				SLOAN
			I envy you.  That's the way I want
			to feel about my work.

EXT. HARLEM STREET - NIGHT

Sloan walks from the subway to her block.

ANGLE ON

Street.  A huge black Chevy Suburban follows her, all the
windows are tinted jet black, you cannot see it all into it.
She notices the vehicle and starts to walk faster.

ANGLE ON

Corner.  As Sloan tries to cross at the corner, the Suburban
pulls up in front of her, blocking her path.

ANGLE ON

Suburban.  A tall black man jumps out of the Chevy.  This is
BIG BLACK.

										  25.


				BIG BLACK
			Li'l Sister.

ANGLE ON

Corner.

				SLOAN
			You idiot.  You almost gave me a
			massive coronary.

				BIG BLACK
			I didn't mean to scare you like that.

				SLOAN
			Well you did.

				BIG BLACK
			Give me some?

				SLOAN
			I'm not huggin' you in the middle
			of the street.  You must be crazy,
			Julius.

				BIG BLACK
			Whoa, hold up li'l sis'.  I done
			told you 'bout that.  Julius ain't
			my name, you better recognize
			Hopkins was our slave name.  My
			true name is...

				SLOAN
			I'm not callin you Big Black Africa.
			Mommy and Daddy named you Julius.

				BIG BLACK
			BIG BLACK is the first name and
			AFRICA is the last.

He hugs her, she becomes lost in his huge arms and laughs.

INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT - NIGHT

Big Black is rummaging through his sister's refrigerator.

				BIG BLACK
			Damn, Sis, you don't keep no food
			up in here in dis' piece.

				SLOAN
			I order out mostly.  So what do I
			owe this visit to?

										  26.


				BIG BLACK
			My group we need some exposure.
			Was wondering if you could hook a
			brother up?

				SLOAN
			Hook you up?  The Mau-Mau's?  You
			must be smoking.  Why in the world
			would I want to hook up a bunch of
			red, black and green flag-waving
			pseudo revolutionairies?

				BIG BLACK
			So now I see where you're coming
			from.  Just because we ain't
			rapping about Gucci, Timberland,
			Rolex, Benz, Cristal, ho's and
			bitches, we're pseudo.

				SLOAN
			Who are you revolting against?

				BIG BLACK
			We're revolting against the powers
			that be, that been enslaving the
			minds and hearts of all people of
			color.  And we won't stop rapping
			till we bring about the overthrow
			of the government of the U.S. of A.

				SLOAN
			Please.

				BIG BLACK
			If you were really down you would
			get us together with that boss of
			yours.  What's his name again?

				SLOAN
			Delacroix.

				BIG BLACK
			Yeah, him.

				SLOAN
			What makes you think he would write
			a show about the Mau-Mau's.

				BIG BLACK
			C'mon, why not?  The Monkees had a
			show.  Look at all that other junk
			that's on TV.  We got underground
			cult following.

										  27.


				SLOAN
			You don't have the demographics.

				BIG BLACK
			So are you telling me that you
			wouldn't even introduce me to
			Delacroix or set up a meeting?  I'm
			talking 'bout me, your only brother,
			ya own flesh and blood, hook a
			brother up, youknowwhatI'msayin'.

				SLOAN
			That'swhatI'msayin'.  I'm not
			blowin' my young career, brother or
			no brother, for you or anybody else.

				BIG BLACK
			There is a name, a term for your
			kind, the likes of you.  Back in
			slavery days, you would be
			classified as a house nigga.

				SLOAN
			If you think I'm a house nigga then
			that's your prerogative.  You got
			your ways to affect change, I have
			mine.  And I would appreciate it
			very much if you took ya field
			nigga ass out of my house.

				BIG BLACK
			My own sister throwin' me out.  I
			hope to seeya later when you get ya
			mind right.  Don't bother letting
			me out.

				SLOAN
			That's mighty black of you.

Big Black slams the door.

INT. DUNWITTY'S OFFICE - MORNING

One by one, the team enters the office and sits down on the
sofa.

				DUNWITTY
			Delacroix, I'm glad you got your
			mind right.

				DELACROIX
			It's right and tight.  Good morning,
			let me introduce you to everybody.
			You know my assistant, Sloan.

										  28.


				SLOAN
			Hello.

				DELACROIX
			This is Cheeba.

				CHEEBA
			Nice to meet you.

				DELACROIX
			And this is Manray.

				MANRAY
			How do you do?

				DUNWITTY
			Good.  I like the names.  Very
			theatrical.

				DELACROIX
			We're all happy to be here and I'm
			going to paint a picture for you.

				DUNWITTY
			I'm wid it.

				DELACROIX
			I've done a lot of soul searching
			and once again you are right.  In
			my previous work it's been all
			surface, superficial.  I have never
			really dug deep.  Not anymore.  As
			Mark Twain fully understood satire
			is the way.  Race has always been a
			hot button in this country's
			history and it needs to be pushed
			harder.  If we are ever to live
			side by side in peace and harmony.
			It's about promoting racial healing.

				DUNWITTY
			Go on.  Good so far.

				DELACROIX
			I know you're familiar with minstrel
			shows.  They came about at the turn
			of the 19th century.  It was a
			variety show in which the talent
			was in blackface - singing, dancing,
			telling jokes, doing skits.
			Dunwitty, I ask you when was the
			last time there was a good variety
			show on the air.  Carol Burnett?
			HeeHaw?

										  29.


				DUNWITTY
			Word!!!

				DELACROIX
			So let's take this great form, this
			very American tradition of
			entertainment into the 21st century,
			into the new millennium.

				DUNWITTY
			The name of the show?

				DELACROIX
			It is called: MANTAN - THE NEW
			MILLENNIUM MINSTREL SHOW.

				DUNWITTY
			I'm lovin' it.  You know how I know?
			Because I'm getting a boner, my
			Johnson is hard, no disrespect my
			sister.

Dunwitty starts walking around his office, pumping his first.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			I'm feelin' dis'!

				DELACROIX
			It will take a lot of courage and
			backbone on the part of the CNS to
			get this on the air.  In fact, I
			would understand fully if the
			subject matter is deemed too
			risque, too controversial.

				DUNWITTY
			Don't worry about that, that's my
			department.  Now who do we cast?
			We need a star.  Can Whoopi sing or
			dance?

				DELACROIX
			I don't know if Whoopi is the way
			to go.

				DUNWITTY
			Are these our two stars, sitting
			here in front of my nose?  Which
			one is Mantan again?

				MANTAN
			That's me.

										  30.


				DELACROIX
			And Cheeba is Sleep 'n' Eat.

CLOSE ON

Cheeba.  A look of surprise is on his face.  Complete, utter
surprise.

				DUNWITTY
			That's a great handle.

				DELACROIX
			Mantan and Sleep 'n Eat.  Two real
			coons.  I know we're way out there
			but it's satire.

				DUNWITTY
			I want you take it there.  All the
			way to the edge and back.

Sloan looks at Delacroix with concern.

				DELACROIX
			Every week we follow the trials and
			tribulations of two real coons -
			Mantan and Sleep 'n Eat.  The Dusky
			Duo.

				DUNWITTY
			What are there character traits?

				DELACROIX
			Ignorant, dullwitted, lazy, and
			unlucky.

				DUNWITTY
			Exactly!

				DELACROIX
			Mantan is an uneducated Negro who
			always by some stroke of
			unbelievable stupidity makes his
			best laid plans go haywire.

				DUNWITTY
			And Sleep 'n Eat is his comical
			sidekick?

				DELACROIX
			Yep, you guessed it.

				DUNWITTY
			This could be bigger than "Amos and
			Andy."

										  31.


				DELACROIX
			Protest finally forced "Amos and
			Andy" off the air.  Could stop us
			from ever getting on.

				DUNWITTY
			Let'em try.  I will kill to make
			this happen.

Delacroix looks at Sloan.

				DELACROIX
			Negroes would be in an uproar.

				DUNWITTY
			So what.  We would just give the
			NAACP a donation that would be the
			end of that.  No such thing as bad
			publicity.  So what.  Earlier you
			said singing and dancing.

				DELACROIX
			Mantan right here is a gifted
			hoofer.  He has educated feet.

				DUNWITTY
			Who are the other characters?

				DELACROIX
			Do we have characters?  How about
			Honeycutt, Snowflake, Rastus,
			Nigger, Jim, Sambo, Jungle Bunny,
			and how could we forget Aunt Jemima.

Dunwitty is dying with laughter.  He's the only one.

				DUNWITTY
			We gonna hit 'em wid da BOMB DICKEY
			on dis' one.  What's the setting?

				DELACROIX
			In the projects.  Like Eddie
			Murphy's "The PJ's."

				DUNWITTY
			Ya first bad move.  Projects been
			done.  That's one of the problems
			now, everything, movies, TV, are
			set in the urban jungle, da hood.
			That's so tired.  Mantan's
			Millennium Minstrel Show should be
			set on a plantation.  In Alabama.
				(MORE)

										  32.


				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			And every week these Alabama porch
			monkeys will make us cry, make us
			laugh, make us look at our own
			humanity.  Make us feel good to be
			alive.

				DELACROIX
			I don't know about that plantation
			angle.

				DUNWITTY
			What are you talkin' 'bout?  It's
			the move.  Stay wid me now.  We're
			movin' fast.  What does everybody
			else think about this?

				SLOAN
			We'd get a lot of mail.

She laughs, it's a fake one at that.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Mr. Dunwitty, there wouldn't be
			another show like it.

				CHEEBA
			I've always wanted to be on
			television.

				DUNWITTY
			I like you.  Sleep 'n Eat.  That's
			funny.  Mantan, how do you feel
			about performing in black face?

				MANTAN
			As long as the hoofing is real,
			that I can do my thing, I can
			blacken up.  Let me hit it, beats
			and rhythms, express myself.

				DUNWITTY
			Show me a little somethin' somethin'.

Mantan starts to put on his new tap shoes.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			Delacroix, you dug deep, deeper
			than deep.

Mantan is ready.

										  33.


				MANTAN
			I'm gonna give you just a taste.
			My tap shoes are brand new.  I
			haven't trained 'em yet.

He starts to work out.

				MANTAN (CONT'D)
			Rhythms, rhythms, rhythms.  Beats,
			beats, beats.  No Fred Astaire
			here, baby.  Just rawness.

Dunwitty clears his desk of everything, just knocks stuff
flying onto the floor.  And Mantan taking the cue, jumps up
on his desk and really starts hitting it.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix, as he watches his creation, it's not a happy face.

CLOSE ON

Mantan, he's bringing it home.  With the final move, he
leaps off the desk into the middle of the office, and FREEZES.

ANGLE ON

The office.

				DUNWITTY
			That'swhatI'mtalkin''bout.
			That'swhatI'mtalkin''bout!  He's
			off the hiz-hook!

				DELACROIX
			We think so.

				DUNWITTY
			Sleep 'n Eat, what do you do?

				CHEEBA
			I play the straight man.  I do some
			singing and dancing also.  I also
			manage Mantan.

				DUNWITTY
			Oh you do so?

				CHEEBA
			I'm the man behind the man behind
			the man.

				DUNWITTY
			You da man.

										  34.


				CHEEBA
			No, you da man.

				DUNWITTY
			I'm gonna run upstairs with this.
			If CNS doesn't want to do this,
			somebody else will have da balls to
			pull the trigger.  I want to thank
			each and every one of you.  This is
			great, Delacroix.  I'll get back to
			you later today.

EXT. STREET - DAY

Cheeba and Mantan are walking in midtown Manhattan.  They
both have a pep in their step, money in their pockets, and a
roof over their heads.

				CHEEBA
			Life is beginning to look up.  It's
			all good in da neighborhood.

				MANTAN
			You might be right.

				CHEEBA
			Why are you smiling so?

His smile is a mile wide.

				MANTAN
			I'm not smiling.

				CHEEBA
			Naw, not you.  It can't be.  That
			hottie Sloan Hopkins.

				MANTAN
			It's that bad, huh?  It's all over
			my face.

				CHEEBA
			No shame in ya game.  She got ya
			nostrils, ya chnoz is wide open.
			Sloan's what we certified ladies'
			men call low hanging fruit.

				MANTAN
			Certified ladies' man, huh?

				CHEEBA
			She's also moorish.

										  35.


				MANTAN
			What's that?

				CHEEBA
			Moorish.  Ya get a little taste of
			dat booty, ya wanna get some MORE.

				MANTAN
			Seconds and thirds, too.

				CHEEBA
			Sloan is all 'dat.  I try her.  I'm
			a tri-sexual.

				MANTAN
			You'd try anything.  I got first
			dibs.  You get ya own stuff.

				CHEEBA
			Naw, just jokin'.  That's you.
			That's you.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

Delacroix sits with Manray and Cheeba in the living room.

				DELACROIX
			I want you to start using the name
			Mantan and not Manray if you don't
			mind.

				MANRAY
			Why?

				DELACROIX
			You have to start getting into your
			character.

				CHEEBA
			At the risk of sounding ignorant...

Cheeba turns quickly towards Manray.

				CHEEBA (CONT'D)
			...don't say a word but who is this
			cat Mantan you keep talkin' 'bout?

Delacroix hits the remote button.  The TV and VCR are powered.

CLOSE ON

Television.  We see MANTAN MORELAND in some obscure movie.

										  36.


				DELACROIX (O.S.)
			This is Mantan Moreland.

CLOSER ON

Television.  Mantan reacts to seeing a ghost.

				DELACROIX (O.S.) (CONT'D)
			He was a clown, a buffoon but he
			was funny.

ANGLE ON

Living room.

				CHEEBA
			That ain't funny.

				MANRAY
			DeLa, I don't know 'bout this.

				DELACROIX
			Gentlemen, the show, our show will
			be satirical.  You know what that
			is, don't you?  Trust me on this one.

				CHEEBA
			We might need some mo' money behind
			this.

				DELACROIX
			That can be done.

				MANRAY
			Mantan?

				DELACROIX
			Mantan!!

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - NIGHT

THE MAU-MAU's in full effect, bob their heads to the funky
track that blasts from the studio monitors.

ANGLE ON

Studio.  They pass around joints that look like they've been
on steroids and 64 ounce JUGULARS of DA BOMB MALT LIQUOR -
liquid crack, the preferred alcoholic beverage of GHETTO
NEGROES.  All the members of the MAU-MAU's are AFRICAN
AMERICAN except one.  There is one Caucasian member.  He
goes by the name 1/16th BLACK, the engineer tech-whiz kid
computer geek.

										  37.


				1/16TH BLACK
			Yo, Big Black, we needs a name for
			this joint.

				BIG BLACK
			How 'bout...

Big Black takes a long, long drag on a joint, then he
quickly empties a 64 oz. in one swing without missing a
beat, without missing a head nod.

				BIG BLACK (CONT'D)
			Black Iz Black?

The whole group goes crazy with the title of the song.

				DOUBLE BLACK
			That's da bomb.

				MO BLACK
			That's gonna give me some
			inspiration.

				JO BLACK
			Gonna make me get my flow on.

				BIG BLACK
			We should call dis da BLACK album.

Everyone starts high-fiving each other.

				SMOOTH BLACK
			Yo, check it out.  We have never
			conformed to none of the white
			man's rules and regulations and
			later for that ole slave owner
			Webster.  Therefore I respectfully
			submit BIG BLACK that we from now
			on, hence forth and whatnot spell
			BLACK: B-L-A-K, not B-L-A-C-K.

				HARD BLACK
			I feel dat.

				1/16TH BLACK
			B-L-A-K.  BLAK.  The darkest of all
			colors, the opposite of white.  A
			member of an African people.  But
			check it out, here's where the grey
			people try to get slick with their
			trickery.  Listen to the full
			connotations.  GLOOMY.  DEPRESSING.
			EVIL.  WICKED.  ANGRY.  SULLEN.
				(MORE)

										  38.


				1/16TH BLACK (CONT'D)
			BLAK OUT.  BLAK LISTED.  BLAK BALL.
			Need I say more.

				BIG BLACK
			B-L-A-K it is.

INT. HOUSE - NIGHT

A middle-aged African-American woman is working in the
kitchen.  Delacroix sits at the kitchen table talking with
her.  This is his MOM, ORCHID DOTHAN.

Orchid puts a plate of food in front of her son.

				ORCHID
			You must think I'm some kind of fool.

				DELACROIX
			It looks delicious.

				ORCHID
			You hear me talkin' to you.  The
			only time you come up here when
			something is wrong.

				DELACROIX
			C'mon, Mommy, don't start with that
			I'm an ungrateful son stuff.

				ORCHID
			I said no such thing.  All I said
			is that something must be wrong.

She sits down with him.

				ORCHID (CONT'D)
			How's the food?

				DELACROIX
			Can't beat it with a hammer.  Well,
			since you asked, it looks like I
			may have a new show, a pilot being
			shot.

				ORCHID
			That's wonderful.  Isn't that what
			you always wanted, a show of your
			own?

He talks between mouthfuls.

										  39.


				DELACROIX
			It was.  It is.  But this is a
			different kind of show.

				ORCHID
			If at first it's not what you want,
			just work that much harder, Peerless.

				DELACROIX
			Mommy, please don't call me that.

				ORCHID
			Son, Peerless is your name.  Now
			you might be one of these Hollywood
			types, change your name and all
			that but Peerless Dothan is on your
			birth certificate.

				DELACROIX
			I know what's on my birth
			certificate.  You heard from Daddy?

				ORCHID
			I guess he's still on the road.
			What kind of show is this?  Are
			they some Negroes in it without
			being buffoons?

				DELACROIX
			To answer your question, there are
			a lot of Negroes in it and what is
			your definition of buffoons?

				ORCHID
			Peerless, I didn't raise a buffoon.
			We have enough of those on
			television already.

				DELACROIX
			Please let me know when you hear
			from Daddy, get a number or
			something.

				ORCHID
			I will.  And good luck with your
			show.  I hope it's a huge success.
			You've worked very hard.  You
			deserve it.

Delacroix gets up from his seat and hugs his mother.

										  40.


INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT

A celebration is going on as Delacroix, Sloan, Cheeba and
Mantan sit at a table.

ANGLE ON

Table.  Cheeba and Mantan are giddy.  Sloan looks at
Delacroix who is visibly not happy.

				SLOAN
			You okay?

				DELACROIX
			I feel like somebody hit me upside
			da head with a sledgehammer.

				CHEEBA
			DeLa - what's the matter with you.

				MANTAN
			You ain't happy about the green
			light?

				SLOAN
			People show their happiness in a
			lot of different ways.

				MANTAN
			Well, homeboy, looks like he's at a
			funeral.

				DELACROIX
			I'm happy for all of us.  It's just
			we have a great responsibility now.
			The pressure is on.

				MANTAN
			Pressure?  DeLa, you don't know
			what the hell real pressure is.
			SHEEETT!!!  This is lightstuff.
			Now when you scramblin' out on the
			street in da January winter and the
			hawk is talkin' to you with NO
			money and NO prospects of money
			anytime soon, now that there is
			some pressure.

				DELACROIX
			I didn't mean it to sound like that.

										  41.


				MANTAN
			That's the way it came out.  Let me
			ask you one question.  Have you
			ever been in want, in need your
			entire privileged life?

				DELACROIX
			Now I'm privileged?!  Why?  Because
			I didn't grow up on food stamps and
			welfare?  Because I didn't call
			home a cardboard box?  No, I never
			ever went to bed hungry and I'm
			proud of it, too.  Whoever told you
			that living in poverty earns you
			somekind of badge of honor flat out
			lied to you.

				MANTAN
			The point I'm trying to make is
			that this is a blessing.  It's
			going to be fun doing this show and
			we should all look at it that way.

Delacroix gets up from the table and leaves.

				CHEEBA
			What's wrong with him?

				MANTAN
			Must be the pressure.

Cheeba and Mantan laugh, give each other some dap.  A highly
attractive PUERTO RICAN female walks over to their table.
This is JESSICA GRILLO.

				JESSICA
			Sorry I'm late.

Cheeba and Mantan are in awe.

				SLOAN
			Hey, girl.  This is my best friend,
			Jessica Grillo.  I invited her down
			to celebrate with us.

				CHEEBA
			I'm Cheeba.

				MANTAN
			I'm Mantan.

They both rise.

										  42.


				CHEEBA
			Please, have a seat.

				MANTAN
			Sloan never told us she had friends
			like you.

				CHEEBA
			In fact, we never knew she had any
			friends period.

				SLOAN
			Later for you.

				JESSICA
			She has a lot of friends

				CHEEBA
			Male?

				JESSICA
			Yes.

				MANTAN
			A lot?

				SLOAN
			Enough.

Sloan and Jessica laugh at the expense of these guys.

				JESSICA
			I propose a toast.

She grabs an empty glass and pours herself some champagne.

				JESSICA (CONT'D)
			To the success of your show.  Good
			luck.

Everyone raises their glasses.  CLINK!

				SLOAN
			Excuse me.

Sloan gets up from the table and takes after Delacroix.

ANGLE ON

Steps. Sloan catches up with Delacroix at the rest room area.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Wait here.

										  43.


She goes to the ladies' cubicle.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix.  He leans against the wall.

ANGLE ON

Bathroom door.  Sloan comes out, grabs him inside.

INT. LADIES' ROOM - NIGHT

Sloan locks the door.

				SLOAN
			What is your problem?

				DELACROIX
			My problem is MANTAN THE NEW
			MILLENIUM MINSTREL SHOW.

				SLOAN
			Why did you even come up with that
			shit if you didn't want it made?

				DELACROIX
			It was the principle.  Dunwitty had
			to be enlightened.  I was making a
			point.  I take pride in my work.
			Plus, I already told you I wasn't
			gonna walk away from my money.

				SLOAN
			Fuck da money.  Why do through all
			this effort?  Why?  Are you looking
			for love from Dunwitty?  For
			respect?  Dunwitty and his likes
			don't give a goddamn about you.  So
			now what are you gonna do?

Someone begins to pound on the bathroom door.

				WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)
			Will you please let me in?  I have
			to use the toilet.

				SLOAN
			You're gonna have to hold it in
			because we're not finished yet...

She returns her attention to Delacroix.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			...QUIT then.

										  44.


				DELACROIX
			Even if money wasn't an issue,
			Dunwitty will still go ahead
			without me and that could be more
			dangerous.

				SLOAN
			What's the chances of MANTAN being
			picked up?

				DELACROIX
			I wouldn't bet against it.  My
			Negroidal ass is stuck between the
			proverbial rock and a hard place.

				SLOAN
			Like I said, all this for some
			twisted, distorted sense of
			principal.  Dunwitty, he just
			tolerates your Negroidal ass, he
			doesn't respect it.

The banging starts again.

				MANAGER'S VOICE (O.S.)
			Please open this bathroom door
			immediately.  You are being very
			inconsiderate.

Sloan unlocks the door and they exit.

ANGLE ON

Ladies' bathroom.  Sloan and Delacroix file past the strange
looks of the manager and FIVE WOMEN waiting to use the
bathroom as they rush in.

INT. DUNWITTY'S OFFICE - MORNING

				DELACROIX
			I strongly feel that a Negro should
			direct this.  This kind of satire
			is a high wire act in a gale storm.
			One misstep and we're doing "Amos
			and Andy."  Only a Negro will have
			the sensitivity and cultural
			awareness to navigate this dangerous
			terrain.

				DUNWITTY
			To hire someone solely on their
			ethnicity, gender or religion is
			not right.  It's un-American.  I
			will hire someone who is most
			qualified for this particular job.

										  45.


				DELACROIX
			I was hoping to perhaps direct some
			episodes myself, if not the pilot
			soon after.

				DUNWITTY
			I want a hot, young white director.
			Maybe the kid, that pheenom who
			just did that hot new sexy Madonna
			video.

				DELACROIX
			You're telling me some white boy is
			gonna direct this pilot?

				DUNWITTY
			I just want you to meet him.  Keep
			an open mind.

				DELACROIX
			Besides, what does he know about
			Negroes?

				DUNWITTY
			Probably nuthin', but that's why
			it's such a sexy way to go.
			Sometimes an outsider has a fresh
			new outlook, a different unique
			perspective.  A black director,
			y'know what he's gonna do given the
			subject matter?  With this kid, the
			possibilities are endless.

				DELACROIX
			What are his qualifications besides
			being a white male and directing a
			hot new sexy freaky Madonna video?

				DUNWITTY
			If Spielburg can direct "The Color
			Purple" and "Amistad", our whiz kid
			can direct the Mantan pilot.

				DELACROIX
			That's exactly my point.  Has he
			even directed actors before in
			anything?

				DUNWITTY
			No!!!  Just meet the guy.  That's
			all I'm asking.  Look, I'll even
			let you choose your own musical
			director.  You can have that.

										  46.


				DELACROIX
			In the immortal words of Derrick
			Coleman, WHOOOPDEEDAMNDOO!!!

				DUNWITTY
			Derrick Coleman, he possessed all
			the talent in the world, coulda,
			shoulda, been a great ballplayer
			but alas D.C. didn't want it bad
			enough.  Delacroix, do you want it?
			Bad enough to kill for it?  Do you
			want it that much.

Delacroix stares at Dunwitty.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - NEXT DAY

Delacroix, followed by Sloan, enters the room full of writers.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix

He surveys the room.

P.O.V. - DELACROIX

All of the writers are Caucasian - male and female.  Every
single last one.

ANGLE ON

Conference room.  Delacroix and Sloan sit down at the head
of the long oval table.

				DELACROIX
			Good morning, for those of you who
			don't know me, I'm Pierre Delacroix.
			I'm running things and this here is
			my assistant Sloan Hopkins.

				SLOAN
			Hello.

				DELACROIX
			I've never worked with any of you
			and you've never worked with me so
			we'll be starting from scratch.
			I'm a fair person, a straight
			shooter and I don't hold my tongue.
			Everybody up in here should know I
			had nothing to do with you being
			hired.
				(MORE)

										  47.


				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			I would have preferred at least one
			other Negro writer.  Any questions?
			Comments?

MONA raises her hand.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Yes, your name?

				MONA
			He, I'm Mona.

				DELACROIX
			Hi, Mona.

				MONA
			I perfectly understand where you're
			coming from.  As a minority I can
			relate to your struggle also.  But
			I think you should give us all a
			chance.  We want this pilot to be
			successful just as much as you.
			Please don't be so quick to judge
			us based only on our whiteness.

				DELACROIX
			Oh, is that what I'm doing?

BETH jumps in.

				BETH
			I think because of our background
			we can bring a unique perspective
			to Mantan.

SETH pipes in also.

				SETH
			A fresh pair of eyes.  A new look,
			insight, new angle that hasn't been
			seen before.

				DELACROIX
			I've heard this somewhere before.

David raises his hand.

										  48.


				DAVID
			My name is David.  I do think it
			would be better to have some
			African-American writers but for
			whatever reason they are not here.
			I don't know if they couldn't find
			any people with experience, they
			wouldn't work for the pay or
			refused to work for the show.  I
			don't know and nobody in this room
			probably knows either.  I'm looking
			at this as a unique opportunity.
			We all should.  I'm a damn good
			writer and I'm ready to go to work.

Everyone in the room applauds.  Sloan looks at Delacroix.

FREEZE FRAME

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			This thing was rigged, the deck was
			stacked, the fix was in.  Could Don
			King be near?  Good thing Sloan had
			my back.  She's my rock.  This was
			going to be a whole lot of work.

UN-FREEZE FRAME

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			David, I appreciate your comments.
			Anybody got an ideas?  Everybody
			just talk out loud.

				MONA
			I've always liked the format of
			Rowan and Martin's "LAUGH-IN."

				ANNA
			That could be cool.

				KIRK
			What about something like "The
			Jeffersons?"  I grew up in Idaho so
			that's how I got my understanding
			of black people.  Through Sherman
			Helmsley, LOUISSEE!!!.

				DAVID
			"Good Times" was better.  Kid Dy-no
			mite!!!

										  49.


				AARON
			You pole are going to far back for
			me.  I think we have to go after a
			hipper feel.  Like the stuff Eddie
			Murphy used to do on "Saturday
			Night Live."

				PETER
			Or Martin.  You go girl.

				JEFF
			What about the  black exploitation
			films?  No one has ever tried
			making that work on TV.

				DAVID
			And for reason.  Have you ever seen
			"Scream Blacula, Scream?"

				MONA
			I think, and Delacroix will agree
			with me, the politics of this show
			have to be right.  We should always
			be laughing with our characters,
			not at them.

CLOSE ON

Delacroix, as the writers continue to ramble on, he lets
them jerk off.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			The mission was accomplished.  All
			of these people left the room
			thinking they would have real input.
			I was writing this pilot alone,
			myself, me.

EXT. STREET - DAY

A long line reaches down the block and around the corner.
It's a "cattle call," open auditions for "Mantan."

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Now came the fun part, finding the
			talented performers to cast in the
			show.

WE DOLLY past the hundreds and hundreds of unemployed
African American actors, many of them dressed in various
costumes.

										  50.


				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Everybody and their mother was
			trying to get in, trying to be seen.
			Trying to get their piece of the
			rock.

INT. REHEARSAL SPACE - DAY

Delacroix sits in the first row with Sloan, RUTH, an African
American casting director.  LEVI, the musical director, also
black, is on the stage at the piano.

AUDITION MONTAGE

WE SEE singers, magicians, dancers, acrobats, comedians,
rappers.  Some good, most are terrible.  Many come out on
stage dressed like mammies, Stepin' Fetchit, slaves, pimps,
ho's, hustlers, and basketball players.  It is a cavalcade
of all the stereotypical roles one has seen.

ANGLE ON

Space.  LULU, a spoken word artist, goes her rendition of
"WAY DOWN ON THE SWANEE RIVER."

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			This was amazing.  Who had told
			these Negroes that this was what we
			were looking for?  The same old
			image, it damn for sure wasn't me.

CLOSE ON

Lulu.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Were people this desperate to get
			work?

CLOSE ON

Delacroix.  He interrupts Lulu.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Thanks, Ms. Lulu.

				LULU
			But I had several more poems.

				DELACROIX
			That's good.  We've seen enough.
			We'll get back to you.

Lulu scurries off stage.

										  51.


				RUTH (O.S.)
			Next.

The Mau-Mau's run onto the stage, yelling and screaming.

They are all fired up, in fact several fire their 9mm's into
the ceiling.

ANGLE - TWO SHOT

Delacroix and Sloan.

				SLOAN
			This is the group I was telling you
			about.

				DELACROIX
			Which one is your brother?

				SLOAN
			The big one.

CLOSE ON

Ruth.

				RUTH
			Let's get started here.

ANGLE ON

STAGE

Big Black preens around on the stage.

				BIG BLACK
			The Mau-Mau's are up in dis place.
			That's right, the Mau-Mau's.

				DELACROIX (O.S.)
			What's your name?

				BIG BLACK
			My righteous name is BIG BLACK.

				DELACROIX (O.S.)
			And what are the Mau-Mau's going to
			do for us today?

				BIG BLACK
			We gonna drop some knowledge,
			wisdom and understanding.  The Mau-
			Mau's, we be scientists.  We drop
			science.

										  52.


CLOSE ON

Sloan, who's trying to disappear.  If she sits any lower
she'll be under her seat.

ON DELACROIX

				DELACROIX
			We're ready when you are.

ON STAGE

				BIG BLACK
			Microphone check.  One.  Two.  One.
			Two.  One.  Two.  Hold up.  I gots
			to give my peeps some props.
			Brothers introduce yourself.

				DOUBLE BLACK
			Yo, I'm Double Black.

				BLACK BLACK
			Check it, Black Black.

				SMOOTH BLACK
			I'm Smooth Black, the lover in dis'
			piece.

				HARD BLACK
			Hard Black.

				MO BLACK
			He's Jo Black.

				JO BLACK
			And he's Mo Black.

				1/16TH BLACK
			I'm last but not least, you can
			call me 1/16th Black.

ON DELACROIX

				DELACROIX
			Good.  We're really blacked-oops,
			backed up, so shall we begin?

ON STAGE

				BIG BLACK
			Microphone check.  One.  Two.  One.
			Two.  Yo, the name of this joint is
			BLAK IZ BLAK.  Hit it.

										  53.


The booming track starts and the Mau-Mau's do their thing,
bouncing all over the stage.  The lyrics about everything
that is BLAK!!!

ON DELACROIX

A look of disbelief is on his face.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Needless to say, the Mau-Mau's did
			not fit into our plans.

ON SLOAN

She's in shock, horrified.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			As I told Sloan, there's a black
			sheep in every family.

BACKSTAGE - LATER THAT DAY

Delacroix is screaming at the top of his lungs.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Finland.  This is a travesty.  A
			debacle.  A mockery.

INT. LOBBY

Dunwitty approaches Delacroix in the lobby of the rehearsal
space.  He is with JUKKA, a young, very young blonde kid.

				DUNWITTY
			Delacroix.  This is the director I
			was telling you about.  Jukka Laks.

				JUKKA
			So nice to meet you.

				DELACROIX
			Nice to meet you.  If you don't
			mind me asking you - how old are you?

				JUKKA
			I just turned twenty.

				DUNWITTY
			I'm gonna leave you two creative
			geniuses alone.

				DELACROIX
			Dunwitty, don't leave.

										  54.


Dunwitty is out.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Where are you from?

				JUKKA
			Helsinki, which is the capital of
			Finland.

				DELACROIX
			Finland.

				JUKKA
			You know, Finlandia vodka?  Yes?

				DELACROIX
			Yes, I know.  Jukka, have you ever
			seen a Negro person before?  Even
			had a real conversation with a real
			Negro before?

				JUKKA
			What's a Negro.

INT. BACKSTAGE

Delacroix continues to rant and rave.  Sloan is unsuccessful
in attempting to make him be quiet.

				DELACROIX
			A fiasco.  A disaster.  A boondoggle.
			An abomination.

INT. LOBBY

				DELACROIX
			Did you just ask me what's a Negro?
			I'M A NEGRO!!!

				JUKKA
			Ahhh!!!  I never heard of that term
			before.  I thought you were BLACK
			of African-American.  No?

				DELACROIX
			Well before there was BLACK or
			AFRICAN AMERICAN, there were
			NEGROES.  I'M A NEGRO.

				JUKKA
			Thank you for correcting my
			ignorance.  I'm looking forward to
			working side by side with you.  I
			feel we make a good team.

										  55.


				DELACROIX
			How did you get this gig?

				JUKKA
			My visual style is very erotic,
			sexy, how do you say - hot?

				DELACROIX
			This is a TV show, not a music video.

				JUKKA
			Then will you teach me what I need
			to know.  Maybe we learn from each
			other, if that's possible, no?

INT. BACKSTAGE - MOMENTS LATER

				DELACROIX
			This is a travesty.  A debacle.

				SLOAN
			You've said that already.

				DELACROIX
			I'm gonna slit my wrists.  Cut my
			throat.  For the love of Joseph.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - NEW DAY

He's sitting behind his desk, reading new "pink" revisions
of the "MANTAN" pilot.  He screams.

				DELACROIX
			For the love of Joseph and Mary.

Delacroix bolts out from his office.

INT. DUNWITTY'S OFFICE - DAY

Delacroix charges in as Dunwitty and Jukka go over the same
"pink" revisions.

				DELACROIX
			I will not be held responsible for
			these revisions.  These changes are
			not the way I want to go.  This is
			an outrage.  This is a sham.  A
			violation!

				DUNWITTY
			Calm down, please.

				JUKKA
			In Finland, when we get upset...

										  56.


				DELACROIX
			I don't give a good goddamn about
			Finland, Norway, Sweden or wherever
			ya blond ass came from.

				DUNWITTY
			We just punched it up a bit.  Made
			it funnier.

				DELACROIX
			Funnier to who and at who's expense?
			Dunwitty, when Negroes start to run
			amok, the boycotts, when the
			demostrations commence, I'm giving
			them your home address.  Let's see
			how you like it when they picket
			your lawn in Greenwich, Connecticut.

				DUNWITTY
			I seriously doubt that will ever
			happen.  Didn't I tell you I know
			your people better than you do.
			But if by some miracle you're
			correct, I'm gonna invite them
			inside my house and we'll have a
			sit down, discuss it like civil
			human beings.

INT. STUDIO - NIGHT

Much activity is going on.  People are moving to and fro.
WE FOLLOW Delacroix and Sloan.

EXT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Delacroix knocks and they enter.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

Mantan sits in front of his mirror.

				DELACROIX
			Just want to say good luck.

				SLOAN
			Break a leg.

She gives Mantan a kiss on his cheek.

				DELACROIX
			Wait a minute.  Hold up.

They all laugh.

										  57.


				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Can I kiss you too?

				MANTAN
			Naw.  I'll take the zero.

				DELACROIX
			You feel good, not nervous?

				MANTAN
			I feel fine.

				DELACROIX
			Not nervous?  Relaxed?

				MANTAN
			Sloan, will you take your boss out
			of here so I can get ready.

EXT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

Sloan and Delacroix enter the dressing room.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			How's the audience?

				DELACROIX
			Fired up.

				SLOAN
			How you feelin'?

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Good.  I'm not sure about this
			material.

				DELACROIX
			The material is fine.

Sloan cuts a look at this liar.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			You really think so?

				DELACROIX
			We're trying to do something new
			here, some groundbreaking stuff.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			It's the bone breaking stuff I'm
			worried about.

										  58.


				SLOAN
			Everything's gonna be alright.  You
			and Mantan will be huge stars after
			tonight.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			You really think so?

				DELACROIX
			Your life will never be the same.

				SLOAN
			Let's leave the man in peace so he
			can get ready.

INT. BACKSTAGE

				SLOAN
			We both lied to him.

				DELACROIX
			What do you want me to say?

				SLOAN
			Just don't lie to me.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

HONEYCUTT, a rotund, elder black man who is one of cast
members, is warming the audience up.

ON AUDIENCE

It's very young and diverse.  They are laughing at the comic
stylings of Honeycutt.

INT. CONTROL BOOTH - NIGHT

Delacroix and Sloan take their seats.

				DELACROIX
			Good luck, Jukka.  Do a good show.

				JUKKA
			Thank you very much.  I always try
			my best.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

Mantan is slowly getting dressed.  He puts on an old,
tattered tails (tuxedo).

										  59.


INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat is also getting dressed.  He wears a worn
Pullman Porter uniform with red hat to match.

INT. CONTROL ROOM - NIGHT

Dunwitty with his black wife in hand, VERNA moves toward
Delacroix and Sloan.

				DUNWITTY
			I want you to meet my lovely wife
			Verna.  Honey, this is Pierre
			Delacroix and Sloan Hopkins.

				VERNA
			Nice to meet you.

				DELACROIX
			Same here.

				SLOAN
			The pleasure is mine.

				VERNA
			My husband has been raving about
			the awesome work you've done.  How
			did you ever think of something
			like this?  It's absolutely
			brilliant.  Pure genius.

				DELACROIX
			I guess it was divine inspiration.

				VERNA
			Hope to see you both after the
			taping.  Congrats in advance.

ON CONTROL BOOTH

Verna and Dunwitty go to the front of the control booth.

TWO SHOT

Delacroix and Sloan.

				SLOAN
			Divine inspiration?

She laughs.

				DELACROIX
			I was trying to be nice.

										  60.


				SLOAN
			I want to apologize about my
			brother and the Mau-Mau's.  I
			should not have imposed them on you.

				DELACROIX
			C'mon.  You were only doing what
			family is supposed to be doing for
			family.  You gave your brother a
			shot.  That's all anybody can ask
			for, an opportunity, a chance, a
			shot.  He got his.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

Mantan is in front of his dressing room mirror.

ON MIRROR

Mantan looks, stares at his reflection.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat is staring at himself also.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

CLOSE ON MANTAN

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			We should blacken up like they did
			it back in the day.  Keep the
			ritual the same.

Mantan puts some corks in a dish.

				SLOAN (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Pour some alcohol on the corks,
			then light it.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat strikes a match to his corks in a dish.

CLOSE ON SLEEP 'N EAT

He watches the cork burn.

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			Let them burnt to a crisp, and when
			burnt out, mash them to a powder.

										  61.


INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

Mantan is mashing the corks.

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			Add water, mix to a thick paste.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat is mixing it all together.

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			And voila!  You have your blackface.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

The audience, which has become restless, starts a rhythmic
clap.

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			Please put cocoa butter on your
			face and hands...

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

ON MANTAN'S HANDS

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			To protect your skin.

He applies cocoa butter to his hands.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

ON SLEEP 'N EAT'S FACE

He rubs cocoa butter all over his face.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

CLOSE ON HANDS

Audience hands are clapping faster.

ON FEET

They're stomping.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

ON MIRROR

Mantan blacks up his face.

										  62.


WE HEAR THE POUNDING OF THE FEET STOMPING AND THE HANDS
CLAPPING.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

ON MIRROR

Sleep 'N Eat blacks up also.

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			The final detail...

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

ON LIPS

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			...are the lips.

Mantan is applying lipstick.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

ON LIPS

Sleep 'N Eat is puckering his lips as he too puts on the
lipstick.

				SLOAN (V.O.)
			The redder the lipstick the better.
			I suggest firetruck red.

ON MIRROR

For the first time WE SEE SLEEP 'N EAT in FULL BLACK FACE.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Show...

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

ON MIRROR

Mantan in FULL BLACK FACE.

				MANTAN
			...TIME!!!

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

The audience is in an uproar when the lights go down.  They
applaud and they quiet as the CURTAIN GOES UP on a bucolic
setting.  It is a combination of WATERMELON PATCH and COTTON
FIELD.

										  63.


ON STAGE

First Sleep 'N Eat then Mantan shuffles onto the stage.

				MANTAN
			This is my best friend Sleep 'N Eat.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			And this is my very best friend
			Mantan.

				BOTH
			We're two real COONS!

The audience lets out nervous laughter.  They don't know
what to think.

				MANTAN
			We both left the hustle and bustle
			of Uptown, Harlem...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...the big apple, New York, New York.

				MANTAN
			To come back to our roots.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Our Alabamy Home.  Now we're
			getting countrified.  We is Bama's.

				MANTAN
			No mo' "city slickers."  Ahh, can't
			you smell the sweet aroma of the
			ripe watermelons and high cotton?

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Tell 'em what you mean Mistuh Mantan.

				MANTAN
			Well, thank you Mistuh Sleep 'N Eat.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Give or cousins some of dem educated
			feets.

Mantan begins to do a slow, steady step.

				SLEEP 'N EAT (CONT'D)
			Cousins, first, second, third and
			distant, let's have Mantan take us
			all the way back to a much more
			simpler time.  A time wen men were
			men, women were women, and Neggras
			knew their place.

										  64.


The AUDIENCE is aghast.  Mantan has picked up the pace.
He's tapping fast and furious.

				MANTAN
			Cousins, I want all of you to go to
			your windows.  Go to your windows
			and yell.  Yell, I'm tired of the
			drugs, the crack babies born out of
			wedlock to crackhead aids infested
			parents.  I'm tired of the inflated
			welfare rolls while good wholesome
			Americans bring less and less of
			their paycheck home every two weeks.
			I'm tired, you're tired, we're all
			tired of these so-called bible-
			thumping God fearing, whore mongling
			Professional athletes.  Aren't you
			tired of these basketball-dunking,
			football-running, hop-hip rapping
			ebonic-speaking sex offenders who
			got ten kids from ten different
			Ho's?  I know I am and so is Sleep
			'N Eat.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			You tellin' the truth.

				MANTAN
			Go to your windows and yell out,
			scream with all the life you can
			muster up inside your assaulted,
			bruised and battered bodies.  I'M
			SICK AND TIRED OF NIGGERS AND I'M
			NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Mantan stops dancing and collapses.

ON AUDIENCE

They're stunned.  They can't believe what they've heard,
what they've seen.  What they've been witness to.

ON YOUNG WHITE COUPLE

They look at the black people in the audience.

ON YOUNG HIP-HOP BLACK MALE

He starts to clap slowly.

ON AUDIENCE

Slowly more black people begin to applaud.  Slowly it sweeps
up into the black people.

										  65.


The WHITE AUDIENCE, of course, has been waiting to see how
their black brothers and sisters would react.  Now feeling
comfortable and safe, they too being to join the applause.

ON AUDIENCE

The applause changes into laughter.  It is not nervous
laughter we hear, but straight out RIOTOUS LAUGHTER.

ON BLACK AND WHITE FACES

The laughter is contagious.

ON STAGE

Mantan starts to move, he's coming back from the dead.  He
slowly gets up from his prostate position as he HEARS:

A WAYBACK ALABAMA JIG played by the house band, THE PORCH
MONKEYS, led by musical director Levi.  Mantan is joined on
stage by the other hoofers in the show: JUNGLE BUNNY,
SNOWFLAKE, SAMBO, AUNT JEMIMA, RASTUS, NIGGER JIM, plus
SLEEP 'N EAT.  Each take turn as it evolves into an elaborate
DANCE NUMBER.  The hoofers and the band are also in black
face.

ON AUDIENCE

They are rolling down the aisles.

INT. CONTROL ROOM - NIGHT

ON DELACROIX

Delacroix looks like he has seen a ghost.

CLOSER

He buries his face in his hands.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NEXT NIGHT

Delacroix is in the same position as the scene before.  Face
buried in his hands.

ON PHONE

It rings and he picks it up.

				DELACROIX
			Hello?

										  66.


EXT. STREETS - NIGHT

Dunwitty drives his Mercedes Benz CL 600 Coupe.

				DUNWITTY
			Yo, DeLa, I just got the news from
			the CNS brass.  They saw some clips
			from the pilot and they're rushing
			it onto the air.  Yo, we're a
			midseason replacement, ordered 12
			shows.  We're on in 3 weeks.  Didya
			hear what I just said, Yo?

ON DUNWITTY

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			They didn't even view a rough cut,
			just some scenes we quickly cut
			together.

ON DELACROIX

				DELACROIX
			This has to be a big mistake.

				DUNWITTY (O.S.)
			The big mistake was my not believing
			in your genius earlier.  From the
			gitgo, from jump street.

				DELACROIX
			Hold on a sec, I got a call.

HE CLICKS OVER.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Hello, Mommy, let me get rid of
			this other call.

INT. BENZ - CONTINUOUS

				DELACROIX (O.S.)
			I gots to go, it's my Moms.

				DUNWITTY
			I want to meet her one day, please
			tell her the great news.  I'm OUT
			like Vanilla Ice.

INT. ORCHID'S HOUSE - NIGHT

She is on the phone with her son.

										  67.


				ORCHID
			Peerless, your father called.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT

				DELACROIX
			I'll be right over.

INT. STREET - NIGHT

It's a warm summer night.

				MANTAN
			So what's up with you?

				SLOAN
			What do you want to know?

				MANTAN
			The good stuff.

				SLOAN
			I'm an asthmatic.  Been one all my
			life.  Can't go anywhere without an
			inhaler.

				MANTAN
			What else?

				SLOAN
			Are you trying to rap to me?

INT. ORCHID'S HOUSE

Delacroix sits at the kitchen table.

				ORCHID
			He wants you to come and see him.

				DELACROIX
			He said that?

				ORCHID
			Yes he did.

				DELACROIX
			Where is he?

				ORCHID
			He's performing at some place
			outside of Richmond, Virginia.

				DELACROIX
			I can't go all the way down south.

										  68.


				ORCHID
			Richmond is not all the way down
			south.

				DELACROIX
			I don't even know why you're still
			concerned over him.  Daddy's not
			with you.

				ORCHID
			Regardless, he still is your father.

				DELACROIX
			It's gonna be hard for me to get
			away with the show taking off.

				ORCHID
			Even more reason to see him.  He'll
			be overjoyed with your success.

				DELACROIX
			C'mon, Mommy.  Daddy hasn't been
			impressed with anything I've ever
			done.  From winning my fifth grade
			Spelling Bee to the present.

				ORCHID
			Peerless, last time, go see your
			father.

EXT. PARK - NIGHT

Mantan and Sloan are sitting on a park bench, nothing is
being said.  He sits up and starts to do a dance for her.
To her.

ON BENCH

Mantan is doing that "Mating" tap dance.

				SLOAN
			Are you trying to seduce me?

He puts his index finger over his mouth - "Quiet."

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			You think that's gonna work, huh?

He quickly jumps up on the bench, does some intricate steps
then pulls Sloan up from her sitting position.

ON MANTAN AND SLOAN

They kiss.

										  69.


EXT. I-95 SOUTH - MORNING

Delacroix is driving "down south."

INT. CAR - CONTINUOUS

Delacroix adjusts the mirror so he can see himself.  HE
SPEAKS TO US through the MIRROR

				DELACROIX
			I figured this was a good time to
			get away.  Just jump in my ride and
			go.  I always did my best thinking
			when I was driving alone.  I needed
			to think out clearly what I was
			going to do with this MANTAN - THE
			NEW MILLENNIUM MINSTREL SHOW.

EXT. I-95 SOUTH

Delacroix is driving on his way to "Ole Virginny."

EXT. MAMA'S SUGAR SHAK - NIGHT

Delacroix pulls up in the parking lot of a rinky-kink,
funky, greasy BAR/CLUB/BAR-B-Q joint.

CLOSE ON NEON SIGN

"MAMA'S SUGAR SHAK" - most the letters do not light up,
underneath it, "2-NITE - JUNEBUG."

INT. MAMA'S SUGAR SHAK

It's loud as hell as Delacroix enters this smoky, dark
establishment.

P.O.V. DELACROIX

This must be a big night in here because the PATRONS are
dressed to the nines.  What's in style down here is a lot
different from what's happening en Nueva York.  Many of the
men are dressed like PIMPS from 70's BLAXPLOITATION FILM,
the ladies like HOOTCHIE MAMAS from "Luke" video.

ON SUGAR SHAK

Delacroix works himself through the crowded BAR/DISCO into
another small room.

ON COMEDY ROOM

He walks into a small space where his father JUNEBUG is on
the stage.

										  70.


ON JUNEBUG

He is a good-looking man, the only speckle of gray in his
hair betrays his age.  As he walks around the small stage
doing his comedy stylings, he keeps a drink in one hand and
sips it often.

ON COMEDY ROOM

Delacroix sits in the back so his father can't see him.

ON DELACROIX

He looks around.

P.O.V. DELACROIX

It's dead in here.  The room is nearly empty.

ON TABLE

A couple gets loud, arguing over something.

ON JUNEBUG

				JUNEBUG
			'Cuse me.  Please.  Can you please
			show me some respect.  I'm up here
			trying to make a living.

				MAN
			Mind yo' business.

				JUNEBUG
			Don't make me have to come over
			there and whoop you upside ya head.

The sparse AUDIENCE laughs.

				JUNEBUG (CONT'D)
			Just messin' with ya.  But please
			if you and your lady need to
			discuss something, take it outside.
			Thank you.

He continues on with his show.

ON TABLE

Delacroix walks over to the fighting couple.

										  71.


				DELACROIX
			Brother man, that's my father up
			there and I drove a long way to see
			him perform.  Please take this
			fifty, go buy you and the young
			lady some drinks in the club.

The guy looks him up and down.

				MAN
			That's yo' Daddy?

Delacroix nods.

				MAN (CONT'D)
			Don't need yo money for drinks.
			Besides, she's drunk already.
			C'mon, let's go.

The guy grabs his friend by the wrist and drags her kicking
and screaming out the room.

CLOSE ON JUNEBUG

				JUNEBUG
			Don't bring your woman out if you
			can't keep her in deep check.  If
			my woman ever did something crazy
			like that I'd put my size 12 dead
			up in her ass.

This gets the biggest laugh of the night.

EXT. DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

Delacroix knocks.

				JUNEBUG (O.S.)
			What do you want?

				DELACROIX
			I want to speak with you.

				JUNEBUG (O.S.)
			Go away, unless you got my money.

				DELACROIX
			It's me, Peerless.

INT. DRESSING ROOM

He enters into a closet, it's a makeshift dressing room.  A
younger lady, much younger than Junebug - DOT - stands
behind him as she massages his neck.

										  72.


Junebug gets up from his chair, rushes to his son and they
embrace.

				JUNEBUG
			Son.  Good to seeya.  Good to seeya.

				DELACROIX
			It's been a long time.

				JUNEBUG
			Pull up a chair.  Oh, excuse me,
			this is my lady DOT.

				DELACROIX
			Pleased to meet you.

				DOT
			Glad to meet you, too.  You are all
			your father talks about.

				DELACROIX
			Is that so?

				JUNEBUG
			Honey, pour me and my son a drink.

They both sit down as drinks are poured.

				DOT
			I'll leave you two alone.

She kisses Junebug on the forehead before leaving.

				JUNEBUG
			Good woman.  I trained her right.

				DELACROIX
			Daddy, she's younger than me.

				JUNEBUG
			My game is still strong.  No Viagra
			for me, don't need no chemicals.
			Just my tonic.

He holds up his drink and kills it in one gulp.

				JUNEBUG (CONT'D)
			Purely for medicinal purposes.

				DELACROIX
			I thought you had promised Mommy
			you stopped.

										  73.


				JUNEBUG
			I did.  I'm not an alcoholic.  I
			just like to drink.

				DELACROIX
			How did you end up here?

				JUNEBUG
			How did I end up at the third rate
			chittlin' circuit greasy hole in
			the wall in West Hell, Virginny?
			Is that what you're asking ya Daddy?

Delacroix takes a sip of his drink.

				DELACROIX
			That's what I'm askin'.

				JUNEBUG
			Because I had too much pride.  Too
			much integrity.  I wouldn't lick
			nobody's butt.  Some material I
			refused to do.

				DELACROIX
			Daddy, it can't be just because of
			that.  There had to be other factors.

Junebug pours himself another stiff one.

				JUNEBUG
			That's the only reason, period.
			They only want one certain kind of
			black comic.

				DELACROIX
			Another one of your conspiracies to
			hold ya career back?

				JUNEBUG
			All I know is what happened to me.
			All that other mess I just file
			into the "life's too short" category.

He downs another one.  Junebug drinks like a fish.

				JUNEBUG (CONT'D)
			Enough about me, what's happening
			with you?

				DELACROIX
			The same old, same old.  Trying to
			get my stuff through.

										  74.


				JUNEBUG
			Dem white boys giving you a hard
			time?

				DELACROIX
			Nuthin' I can't handle.

				JUNEBUG
			The truth is never let them seeya
			sweat.  You do that, that's half
			the battle.

				DELACROIX
			Where do you go from here?

				JUNEBUG
			Three nights Charleston, South
			Carolina.

				DELACROIX
			I didn't mean that, in life.

				JUNEBUG
			In life?  I'ma keep on living,
			having a good drink, got me a good
			young woman, make a couple of
			dollars and make people laugh.
			Haven't I always tol' you all
			nigga's are entertainers?  The
			question is what are you gonna do,
			Peerless?

INT. HOTEL HALLWAY - NIGHT

Delacroix and Dot are on either side of Junebug as they hold
him up.

ON DOOR

Delacroix struggles to put the key in the door.

INT. HOTEL ROOM

The door is kicked open as the trio comes in.  Junebug is
drunk as a skunk.

				JUNEBUG
			I'm not an alcoholic.  I just like
			to drink.

				DOT
			We know that baby.

										  75.


				DELACROIX
			Let's get him over to the bed.

				JUNEBUG
			Baby, you treat me so good.
			Peerless, you're a good son, I love
			you.  You never gave me no trouble.

They lay him down on the bed.

				DELACROIX
			I love you too, Daddy.

				JUNEBUG
			Always keep 'em laughing.

Dot takes off his shoes.  He's out like a light.  Gone.

				DELACROIX
			How long has my father been like
			this?

				DOT
			Not that often.  He was excited to
			see you.

				DELACROIX
			So he drank himself into a stuper?

				DOT
			The drinking is for the pain.  It
			doesn't kill it, just dulls it.

				DELACROIX
			So what's up with you?

				DOT
			I was a hostess at this club, your
			Daddy was performing and I had
			never laughed so hard in my life.
			He asked me to come with him.  I
			quit my job and we've been together
			ever since.

Delacroix pulls out his billfold and gives Dot five crisp
new model hundred dollar bills.

				DELACROIX
			Don't tell him it's from me or he
			won't take it.

				DOT
			Your father is proud of you.

										  76.


				DELACROIX
			He never showed it.

				DOT
			He did the best way he knew how,
			Junebug is stubborn just like you.

Delacroix kisses his sleeping father of the forehead.

				DOT (CONT'D)
			I'll take care of him.

EXT. I-95 NORTH - NIGHT

Delacroix is driving back home - up North.

INT. CAR - CONTINUOUS

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			My Daddy.  I'm not mad at him.  Not
			at all.  Junebug was the reason I
			got into this business in the first
			place.

CLOSER

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			And I thank him for that.  However,
			it did me no good seeing him in
			that state.  Daddy was a broken man.
			He had been a strong man, with
			conviction, integrity, principles
			and look where it had gotten him.
			I had to ask myself did I want to
			end up where he was?

OVERHEAD REAR VIEW MIRROR

Delacroix adjusts the mirror so he can see himself, and
SPEAK TO US.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			That was the last time I ever saw
			my father.

EXT. I-95 NORTH

Delacroix's car flies past us.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

ON MIRROR

Mantan starts to black up.

										  77.


INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat also begins to black up.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

Honeycutt stands in front of the festive young, mixed
audience.

				HONEYCUTT
			Everybody say Ho!

				AUDIENCE
			Ho!

				HONEYCUTT
			That'swhatI'mtalkin'bout!
			That'swhatI'mtalkin'bout!  I want
			to be the first to welcome you to
			the second taping of Mantan - The
			New Millennium Minstrel Show.

Audience applauds.

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			My name is Honeycutt and I want to
			try something different.  Can you
			do this for me?

ON AUDIENCE

				AUDIENCE
			Yeah!

BACK ON HONEYCUTT

				HONEYCUTT
			I'm gonna start a chant and I want
			y'all to follow me.  Let's make our
			own 2 real coons know you're ready
			to start the show.

CLOSER

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			Let's go Niggers.  Then clap five
			times like this.

Honeycutt claps the cadence.

										  78.


				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			C'mon.  It's easy.  It's the same
			thing y'all do out at the Yankee
			game, no different 'cept we changing
			one word.  Everybody go it?

ON AUDIENCE

				AUDIENCE
			YEAH!

CLOSER ON HONEYCUTT

				HONEYCUTT
			Alright.  Here we go.  Let's go
			NIGGERS!  LET'S GO NIGGERS!

CLOSE ON AUDIENCE

				AUDIENCE
			Let's go NIGGERS.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

ON MIRROR

Mantan is finishing the black.

				AUDIENCE (O.S.)
			Let's go niggers!

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat is finishing his Black.

				AUDIENCE (O.S.)
			Let's go niggers!

INT. STAGE - CONTINUOUS

				HONEYCUTT
			Louder.  They can't hear you.

CLOSE ON YOUNG BLACK WOMAN

				YOUNG BLACK WOMAN
			LET'S GO NIGGERS!

CLOSE ON YOUNG WHITE MALE

				YOUNG WHITE MALE
			LET'S GO NIGGERS!

										  79.


INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

Mantan is applying his FIRETRUCK RED lipstick.

				AUDIENCE (O.S.)
			LET'S GO NIGGERS!

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM

Sleep 'N Eat's also applying lipstick.

				AUDIENCE (O.S.)
			LET'S GO NIGGERS!

INT. STAGE - CONTINUOUS

Their CHANT is deafening.  The audience's hyped.

				HONEYCUTT
			You sound so good to me.  Ladies
			and gentlemen, boys and girls,
			without further adieu, let's
			welcome youknowwhoI'mtalkin'about,
			your two favorite coons, Da Dusky
			Duo, our stars Mantan and Sleep 'N
			Eat.

The audience goes crazy as the curtain goes up and the house
band kicks in with the Mantan theme.

ON STAGE

The setting is a chicken coop, live roosters and chickens
move freely about Mantan and Sleep 'N Eat.  They start right
into their routine at a furious pace.

				MANTAN
			Y'know my lady Lucindy?

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			The one with da big...

				MANTAN
			Not her, the one with the little...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Oh her.

				MANTAN
			Tomorrow is her birthday and I want
			to get her something really nice,
			like a...

										  80.


				SLEEP 'N EAT
			No, not that.  How 'bout...

				MANTAN
			She hates dem.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Too bad.  How 'bout a dress?

				MANTAN
			Sleep 'N Eat, one of dem slinky,
			sexy, little foxy...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Mantan, way too short, too tight.
			Get her one of dose...

				MANTAN
			...to big.  The in-between one, not
			too tight, not too lose.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			That'll work.  I just bought one
			for myself.

Mantan cocks his limp wrist.  The audience ROARS.

				SLEEP 'N EAT (CONT'D)
			Not for me, my woolly headed cotton
			pickin' friend for...

				MANTAN
			I thought you got rid of...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...that was Vicki, her best friend.
			Dat dress will cast ya round...

				MANTAN
			...dat's too much money.  I can't
			'ford it.  I needs me a dress that
			cost no mo' than...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...aconite get it dat cheap.

				MANTAN
			I'll buy her a less expensive
			dress, so I can have some money
			left over to take her out to dinner.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			We should go out on a double date.

										  81.


				MANTAN
			I heard ya lady is wild.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			No.  That's her second cousin.
			Who's married to Li'l Bit.

				MANTAN
			Oh, because on our first date, she
			let me...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...no, she didn't...

				MANTAN
			...yes she did.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...I heard different, thought that
			was...

				MANTAN
			...not that time...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			So when are you comin' to pick us up?

				MANTAN
			Around...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...too early...

				MANTAN
			...then what about...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...too late, maybe around...

				MANTAN
			...perfect...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			That's what I like about you and me.
			We git along...

				MANTAN
			...like macaroni and cheese...

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...like grits and butter...

				MANTAN
			...like fried and chicken...

										  82.


				SLEEP 'N EAT
			...like sleep and eat.

OFF-SCREEN we HEAR the VOICE of MASSA CHARLIE, he's the
overseer of this plantation.

				MASSA CHARLIE (O.S.)
			Who goes in there?

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			We'd better hide.

				MANTAN
			It's dat mean, evil overseer Massa
			Charlie.

They hide behind some boxes.

				MASSA CHARLIE
			I say who goes in there?

				BOTH
			There's nobody in here 'cept us
			chickens.

Massa Charlie enters the chicken coops with a SHOTGUN
blazing.  Sleep 'N Eat and Mantan do a jig as they try to
escape the buckshot.

ON AUDIENCE

They're rolling down the aisles in hysterics.

INT. CONTROL BOOTH

Everyone in the booth is laughing uncontrollably.  Except
Delacroix.  Even Sloan is dying.

				DELACROIX
			Who's side are you on?

				SLOAN
			I'm sorry, I can't help it.  It's
			too funny.

Delacroix starts to crack a smile.  He is definitely trying
to hold it in.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

He sits in front of the television, which is off.

										  83.


				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			It was the Day of Reckoning.  After
			a massive advertising and publicity
			campaign...

CLOSER

Delacroix stares at the blank screen.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			...the public would finally get a
			chance to view Mantan.  I was
			feelin' a little bit like Dr.
			Frankenstein.

INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT - NIGHT

Sloan, Jessica, Mantan and Cheeba are gathered around the
television in the small studio apartment, jabbering away.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			What would their reaction be?  I
			hadn't the foggiest.

				SLOAN
			Everybody shut up.

ON TV SCREEN

We see the OPENING of MANTAN - THE NEW MILLENNIUM MINSTREL
SHOW.  It is in CLAYMATION.  Mantan and Sleep 'N Eat are
doing a "jig."  Their noses and lips are done in a grotesque
characterization, BIG WIDE BEGROIDAL NOSES and JUICY RED
SAUCER SOUP COOLING LIPS.

				HONEYCUTT (V.O.)
			Calling all my cousins, you're
			about to take a trip down to Hang
			'Em High Plantation, home of your
			two favorite coons, Mantan and
			Sleep 'N Eat.

ON SLOAN, JESSICA, MANTAN, AND CHEEBA

Mantan isn't happy.

				MANTAN
			Why they gotta make my nose so big?

				CHEEBA
			Look at my lips.

				JESSICA
			I think it looks cute.

										  84.


ON SLOAN

She can't believe her eyes.

				HONEYCUTT (V.O.)
			Mantan - The New Millennium Minstrel
			Show is proudly sponsored by...

ON TV SCREEN

DA BOMB PRODUCT SHOT AND LOGO

				HONEYCUTT (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			...Da Bomb.  We'll take you there.
			And...

CLOSER ON TV SCREEN

TIMMI HILLNIGGER PRODUCT SHOT AND LOGO

				HONEYCUTT (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			...Timmi Hillnigger.  Keep it
			really real.

ON HONEYCUTT

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			We will be right back with the
			start of our show, but first, a
			word from our proud sponsors.

CUT TO COMMERCIAL #1

EXT. STREET CORNER - ANY GHETTO, U.S.A. - DAY

The TRACK is BOOMING.  The fire hydrant is open on this
sizzling day and practically butt naked "Playaz" and "Hoes"
dance in the water.  Each one is guzzling from 64 ounce
JUGULARS of DA BOMB which are in the shape of a bomb.

ON HONEYCUTT AND CROWD

He's in the spot, he's the spokesperson.

				HONEYCUTT
			DA BOMB.  Yo.  It's 125% pure
			pleasure MALT LIQUOR.

				HOOCHIE #1
			It's Da Bomb, Baby.

				PLAYA #1
			It's Da Bomb, Baby.

										  85.


ON CROWD

Nothing but butts and breasts gyrating.

				HONEYCUTT (V.O.)
			Clinical testing has found that
			Viagra doesn't work on black
			"johnson's."  That's why our
			scientists developed Da Bomb for
			you.  It makes you feel like a MAN
			and it makes dem bitches feel like
			Natural Women - I mean Ho's.

				PLAYA #2
			It makes my nature rise.

				HOOCHIE #2
			I want to get funked up.

				HONEYCUTT
			DA BOMB - 125% pure pleasure malt
			liquor.

Honeycutt takes a big swallow from his 64 oz. Jugular.  Two
statuesque ladies sandwich him, grinding up on Honeycutt.
He takes the jugular from his lips.  As he speaks, flames
come out of his mouth.

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			Oooooo-weeee!!  Da Bomb makes me
			wanna get my freak on.

				TWO MO' HOOCHIES
			Honeycutt, let's get our swerve [email protected]

CUT TO COMMERCIAL #2

EXT. STREET CORNER - ANY GHETTO, U.S.A. - DAY

A middled-aged Caucasian male, TIMMI HILLNIGGER, is
surrounded by a mob deep of hard-looking PLAYAZ.

				TIMMY HILLNIGGER
			Yo, my name be Timmi Hillnigger.  I
			was born and raised up in Strong
			Island so you know I know about my
			peeps, my niggaz in the git-toe.  I
			design and own TIMMI HILLNIGGER
			125% Authentic Git-Toe active wear.

DAWG #1 steps forward.

				DAWG #1
			Hillnigger keeps it real.

										  86.


DAWG #2 steps forward also.

				DAWG #2
			Timmi's gots all da latest gear.

				TIMMY HILLNIGGER
			If you want to keep it really real,
			never get out of the git-toe, stay
			broke and continue to add to my
			multibillion dollar corporation,
			keep buyin' all my gear.  The Timmi
			Hillnigger collection.  We keep it
			so real we give you the bullet holes.

Hoe #1 laying in a white thong on top of a white Rolls-Royce.

				HOE #1
			All my niggaz wear Hillnigger or
			they don't wear a damn thing at all.
			It's Git-toe Fabulous.

EXT. THE WHITE HOUSE - NIGHT

The lights are on in the White House.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			I was sunk, dead.  My goose was
			cooked.  The cat was in the bag and
			the bag was in the river.

INT. THE WHITE HOUSE

President Clinton is seen behind a TV set laughing his head
off.

INT. THE WHITE HOUSE - PRESS CONFERENCE - DAY

The President of the U.S. stands behind a podium and takes
questions from the press.

				REPORTER
			Did you watch MANTAN - THE NEW
			MILLENNIUM MINSTREL SHOW last night?

				PRESIDENT CLINTON
			Yes I did and I can honestly say I
			feel it promotes racial healing.

INT. DUNWITTY'S OFFICE - MORNING

Dunwitty, Delacroix and Sloan are joined by a young Caucasian
woman, MYRNA GOLDFARB.

										  87.


				DUNWITTY
			I know all of you have seen the
			overnight ratings.  Through the
			roof.  But in this game you gotta
			be one, two, three steps ahead.  I
			introduce you to Myrna Goldfarb.
			She's the best media consultant in
			the biz.

				MYRNA
			First, I would like to say I love
			the show.  It's very courageous.
			My parents marched in Selma,
			Alabama with Dr. King.

				DELACROIX
			Why are you here?

				MYRNA
			Good question, straight to the
			point.  I like your style.  Because
			of the content of the show we can
			expect some spirited reactions.

				DUNWITTY
			Myrna is here to help us plan our
			strategy.

				MYRNA
			The best defense is offense.

				DELACROIX
			I thought it was the other way
			around.

				MYRNA
			You get my point.  I've mapped out
			some strategies to help bolster our
			position.

				SLOAN
			Which is?

				MYRNA
			That this is fun.  Nice wholesome
			fun.

				DUNWITTY
			Goldfarb, run it down for them.

										  88.


				MYRNA
			The Mantan Manifesto.  Catchy ain't
			it?  Number One.  We gainfully
			employ African Americans, in front
			of and behind the cameras.  Two.
			Let the audience decide.  Three.
			Who put these critics in charge?
			These so-called cultural police?
			Four.  Who determines what is black?
			Five.  Mantan is a satire.  Six.
			If they can't take a joke, "F" 'em.

				DUNWITTY
			We all stick to this, it's smooth
			sailing.

				SLOAN
			It sounds kinda simplistic to me.

				MYRNA
			I've done my research.

				DELACROIX
			These are black folks we're talkin'
			about, not some lab mice in a cage.

				MYRNA
			Monsieur Delacroix, I got my PhD in
			African-American studies from Yale,
			so I do feel I'm qualified.

				DUNWITTY
			Let Myrna finish.

				MYRNA
			Thank you.  And always smile.

				DELACROIX
			Yeah, show dem pearly whites.

She ignores him.

				MYRNA
			Wear Kente cloth, invoke the name
			of Dr. Martin Luther King, use the
			word "community" often when talking
			about Mantan.  And finally our
			biggest plus is you, Pierre
			Delacroix.

				DELACROIX
			Me?

										  89.


				DUNWITTY
			Yes you!

				MYRNA
			This show was created, conceived by
			you, a non-threatening African-
			American male.  Voila.  End of
			argument.  It can't be racist
			because you're black.

				DELACROIX
			I'm not black.  I'm a NEGRO!!!

INT. CNS HALLWAY - POST MEETING

Sloan and Delacroix are walking in the hallway.  They keep
getting interrupted by people who congratulate Delacroix on
the success of the show.

				SLOAN
			So you have your small victory, now
			what?

				DELACROIX
			A small victory isn't that small
			when you've been use to losing.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - MORNING

Sloan hands Delacroix a wrapped gift.

				DELACROIX
			What is this?

				SLOAN
			A gift.

				DELACROIX
			For what?

				SLOAN
			No matter what you think, you did
			come up with something unique.
			Open it.

Delacroix opens his gift.  It is one of those old cast iron
Black Collectibles.  This one is called "THE JOLLY NIGGER
BANK," a head of a Negro, big lips, big nose, wide eyes.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Put a coin in the hand.

He puts a quarter in the hand.

										  90.


				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Watch this.

She pushes the lever and the mouth opens, the quarter flies
in and his eyes go to the top of his head.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Read it on the back.

Delacroix reads.

				DELACROIX
			The Jolly Nigger Bank.

				SLOAN
			This is authentic, not a repro,
			circa turn of the century.

				DELACROIX
			Thanks.

				SLOAN
			I thought it was appropiate.

				DELACROIX
			Is that good or bad?

				SLOAN
			It's all good.  You got a hit show,
			you're gonna need a bank.  Plus, I
			love these old black collectibles.

				DELACROIX
			How so?

				SLOAN
			To me, it shows part of our history
			in this country, a time when we
			were considered inferior, sub-human.

CLOSE ON JOLLY NIGGER BANK

Delacroix puts another quarter in the hand and flips the
lever.  The quarter flies into his mouth as his eyes roll to
the top of his head.

INT. WLIB - DAY

Delacroix is a guest on the GARY BYRD show.  WLIB is the
number one black talk radio station in the nation.

										  91.


				GARY BYRD
			Our guest today is Pierre Delacroix.
			He is the creator of the highly
			controversial TV show MANTAN.
			Let's get right into it.  You have
			been called by some in the community
			a traitor, a sellout, an Uncle Tom.
			Why does your show generate such
			feelings?

				DELACROIX
			Because race has always been a
			sensitive issue in this country.
			Gary, I have no problem with people
			disagreeing with the show, it's
			when folks start trying to mess
			with my inherent right as an
			artist, that's when I get mad.  No
			one, in any way, shape or form
			should be censored.

				GARY BYRD
			No matter how sexist or racist the
			material may be?

				DELACROIX
			Yes.  And I say yes because who is
			to judge?  Who is to stand before
			us and say this is righteous and
			this is not?  Who?  Who can play God?

				GARY BYRD
			But the line has to be drawn.

				DELACROIX
			Don't you people get it?  We're in
			the 21st Century.  Slavery was over
			four hundred years ago.  All that
			stuff people talked in the old
			days, it's over.  Folks always
			crying, white man this, white man
			that.  Let's all grow up.

				GARY BYRD
			Are you trying to excuse our
			Holocaust?

				DELACROIX
			Can I finish?  Thank you.  I had a
			great Aunt, we called her Sister.
			She went to her grave not believing
			man had walked on the Moon.
				(MORE)

										  92.


				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			When I was a little kid, I would
			argue with her, "it's on TV."  She
			would answer "I don't care what's
			on that idiot box.  No MAN is on
			the MOON."  Well, there are a lot
			of your Negroes just like my Aunt
			Sister.  Face up to it.  The world
			has changed and if you don't adapt,
			change with it, you will be left
			behind.  This show is a parody.
			Are you telling me that nobody can
			use some humor, have some laughs in
			their lives?  Is that what you're
			telling me?

EXT. TIMES SQUARE - NIGHT

Mantan and Cheeba gaze skyward at a behemoth billboard for
their show.  Some people recognize them and start asking for
autographs and a crowd forms.

ON MANTAN AND CHEEBA

They're enjoying the adulation.

ANOTHER CORNER

Big Black and the Mau-Mau's also look up at the 2 REAL COONS
billboard.  Their faces say they are not happy.

CLOSE ON 2 REAL COONS BILLBOARD

								  CUT TO:

CLOSE ON AMERICAN FLAG

It blows majestically in the wind.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			When American people want something,
			they want it now, they want it big.

NEWSREEL FOOTAGE

Kids swinging in their hula hoops.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			They wanted the hula hoop...

NEWSREEL FOOTAGE

Kids playing with their yo-yo's.

										  93.


				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			They wanted their yo-yo's.

NEWSREEL FOOTAGE

A young girl petting her Pet Rock.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Who could ever forget those lovable
			pet rocks.

								  CUT TO:

INT. TOYS "R" US

Parents are fighting over Beanie Babies.  It's a RUCKUS.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Beanie Babies...

EXT. TIMES SQUARE - NIGHT

Mantan and Sleep 'N Eat are doing a tap dance on the GIANT
DIAMONDVISION SCREEN.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Now the latest, hottest, newest
			sensation across the nation was...

CLOSE ON MANTAN AND SLEEP 'N EAT

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			BLACKFACE!!!

BLACKFACE MONTAGE

We SEE AMERICANS - young, old, black and white in BLACKFACE.
MANTAN and SLEEP 'N EAT are #1 and #2 in the best-selling
Halloween masks.  They fly out of the stores.  We SEE Mantan
and Sleep 'N Eat THE DUSKY DUO Action Dolls, backpacks,
lunch boxes, T-shirts, jackets, board games, watches, and
CD-Rom video games.  Football players, wrestlers in black
face also.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			It was the rage.

INT. RECORDING STUDIO

Big Black stands behind 1/16th Black who sits in front of a
laptop computer.

										  94.


				1/16TH BLACK
			Big Black, I can't log on the
			Mantan Website now, it's overloaded.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			The Mantan - The New Millennium
			Minstrel Show at www.nigger.com was
			getting 500,000 hits a day.

				BIG BLACK
			Keep trying.

				1/16TH BLACK
			I'm on it.

INT. CAR DEALER - DAY

A Mercedes-Benz salesman is showing Mantan all the newest,
latest models.

INT. JUSTINE'S RESTAURANT - NIGHT

Mantan and Cheeba sit at a big table with Puff Daddy, Andre
Harrell, Russell Simmons and other assorted RAPPERS.
Everyone is drinking that DOM P.  Buxom Hotties sit in
between the BIG WILLIES.

EXT. CNS BUILDING - DAY

A group of protesters led by the REVEREND JESSE JACKSON and
AL SHARPTON carry signs and banners objecting to Mantan.
They're calling upon the FCC to pull the show off the air
and for the boycotting of the show's two sponsors: TIMMI
HILLNIGGER and DA BOMB MALT LIQUOR.

ON PROTESTERS

The press is watching.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - DAY

Delacroix has now decorated his entire office with Black
Collectibles Art.  WE SEE black jockey lawn pieces, banks,
mammies, signs for products, etc.

ON WINDOW

Delacroix and Mantan are looking out the office window down
on the protesters.

				MANTAN
			Why is Jess and Reverend Al down
			there?

										  95.


				DELACROIX
			So they can be on TV.

				MANTAN
			You sound like the media.

				DELACROIX
			This is nothing.  It will blow over
			by tomorrow.

				MANTAN
			Same thing Giuliani said.

				DELACROIX
			Tomorrow it will be all about
			cruelty to animals or some sex
			scandal.  Besides, there is no such
			thing as bad publicity.

He hands Mantan a wrapped gift.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Rest your mind.  It's a little
			somethin' something.

Mantan opens it.  He pulls out an old pair of tap shoes.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Those were the last pair of tap
			shoes worn by Bill "Bojangles"
			Robinson.  In fact, he died with
			them on.

Mantan starts to laugh.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			No joke.  Serious.

				MANTAN
			Hope the same thing doesn't happen
			to me.  That's some big shoes to
			fill.

				DELACROIX
			In time.

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - NIGHT

The Mau-Mau's are in meeting.  They all drink 64 ounce
jugulars of Da Bomb, are all attired from head to toe in
TIMMI HILLNIGGER Active Ghetto Wear and brandish their 9's.

				BIG BLACK
			That Tom, That Negro...

										  96.


				DOUBLE BLACK
			...that handkerchief head...

				BLACK BLACK
			...dancing monkey...

				1/16TH BLACK
			...Benedict Arnold...

				BIG BLACK
			...that simpleton is holding back
			the race.  They got rid of us and
			keep those two buffoons, Mantan and
			Sleep 'N Eat, y'knowwhatI'msayin'?

				HARD BLACK
			Yo, Big Black, Sleep 'N Eat ain't
			even a nigger, y'knowwhatI'msayin'?

				SMOOTH BLACK
			He's Mexican, y'knowwhatI'msayin'?

				MO BLACK
			He's Dominican, y'knowwhatI'msayin'?

				JO BLACK
			He's Peter Rican,
			y'knowwhatI'msayin'?

				BIG BLACK
			Same thing, y'knowwhatI'msayin',
			y'knowwhatI'msayin'!

				1/16TH BLACK
			We know.  We know.  Yo, check it,
			my black brothers, we can't let
			this slide.  Not this injustice.
			Nah, no way.  Dem' two real coons
			iz ill.

				BIG BLACK
			1/16, tru' 'dat.  True 'dat.

				DOUBLE BLACK
			Let me gat him.

				BIG BLACK
			Nah, too easy, this has to be
			symbolic, has to be on the world
			stage.

INT. MANTAN'S APARTMENT - CENTRAL PARK WEST - DAY

Mantan is showing Sloan his new residence.

										  97.


				SLOAN
			This is a nice place.  It must have
			cost a pretty penny.

				MANTAN
			Sloan, I got it like 'dat.

				SLOAN
			Oh you do, huh?

				MANTAN
			Just a little something' somethin'.

				SLOAN
			I hope you save a little somethin'
			somethin'.

				MANTAN
			Gots no intention of ending up broke.

				SLOAN
			Y'know, at the beginnin' of the
			century, African-American had to
			perform in blackface.  You ever
			heard of Bert Williams?  He was a
			great artist.

				MANTAN
			No, before my time.

				SLOAN
			You don't read, do you?

				MANTAN
			Never read a book in my whole life.

				SLOAN
			Maybe you need to start.

				MANTAN
			Maybe I need to do a lot of things.

				SLOAN
			Bert Williams and the rest, they
			had to black up.  They had no
			choice.  They were considered
			3/5ths of a human being.  Did you
			know that's written in the
			Constitution of the United States?

										  98.


				MANTAN
			Why all of a sudden are you flippin'
			on me?  This blackface thing was
			part of the deal from the git-go.
			Don't even try to play it like you
			ain't a part of all this.  You down
			with Delacroix.

				SLOAN
			I just don't want you and Cheeba to
			get hurt.

				MANTAN
			We can look out for ourselves.

INT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

Sleep 'N Eat is applying his black face.

INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM

Mantan also puts on his mask.

INT. STAGE

CLOSE ON HONEYCUTT

				HONEYCUTT
			Let's have a warm nigger applause
			for our two favorite coons, Mantan
			and Sleep 'N Eat.  TWO REAL COONS!

ON AUDIENCE

The entire audience is in BLACK FACE.  They applaud, yell,
cheer wildly.  This is becoming a religious cult.

ON STAGE

The curtain rises on Mantan and Sleep 'N Eat.  They are in a
cotton field.

				MANTAN
			I fell out of my bed last night.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			You slept too near where you got in?

				MANTAN
			I slept too near where I fell out.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			You expect the unexpected in
			circumstances of that peculiarity.

										  99.


				MANTAN
			Sleep 'N Eat, what's the matter
			with you?  Using all dose ten
			dollar words?

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Mantan, it is possible that my
			hyphenated sentences are entirely
			too complex for all the intellect
			contained in that diminutive coconut?

				MANTAN
			Hold on, you allegorical hypothesis.
			Don't cross words with me.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Ain't Jemima on the pancake box?

				MANTAN
			Dat's yo Uncle Ben.  That reminds
			me, I've seen a lot of troubles
			lately.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			How be dat?

				MANTAN
			I don't know who I am.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Well, I'll be an Alabama porch
			monkey's uncle.

				MANTAN
			Years ago I married a widow who had
			a grown-up daughter.  My daddy
			visited us often, fell in love with
			my stepdaughter and married her.
			Thusly he became my son-in-law and
			my stepdaughter became my mother
			because she was my father's wife.
			Soon after dis my wife gave birth
			to a son, which of course was my
			father's brother in-law and my
			uncle, for he was the brother of my
			step-mother.  My father's wife also
			became the mother of a son.  He was
			of course my brother and also my
			grandchild for he was the son of my
			daughter.  Accordingly, my wife was
			my grandmother because she was my
			mother's mother.
				(MORE)

										 100.


				MANTAN (CONT'D)
			Sleep 'N Eat, I was my wife's
			husband and grandchild at one and
			the same time.  And lo' and behold,
			as the husband of a person's
			grandmother is his grandfather, I
			Mantan, became my own grandfather.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			Mantan, dat sho' is a whopper.

They both start to do the jig.

INT. CONTROL BOOTH

Delacroix is dying laughing.

				DUNWITTY
			You couldn't hold out any longer,
			huh?

ON SLOAN

She looks at Delacroix, her face tells us she's not amused
at all.

ON TV SCREEN

The Dusky Duo is joined on the cotton patch by Snowflake,
Rastus, Sambo, Nigga Jim, Jungle Bunny, Aunt Jemima, And the
Porch Monkeys Band.

				MANTAN
			I feel a song a comin' on.

				SLEEP 'N EAT
			A song a comin' I feel.

The Porch Monkeys kick in and Mantan sings.

				MANTAN
			I fell right dead in love/wid da
			sweetest little dove/little LuLu
			Snow from Tennessee/she made a
			slave of me/an' from her I'se never
			free/I'd do anything she'd ask me
			to...

Sleep 'N Eat takes over.

										 101.


				SLEEP 'N EAT
			De money I did save/to dat yeller
			gal I gave/for to keep till we was
			wed/she told me dat nobody'd get
			away dat cash/I'll take good care
			of date, she said.

Everybody joins in for the chorus.

				PIKCANINNINIES
			She's de cutest gal in all dis
			world I know/If you met her you
			would say it so/Oh, Lulu, Lulu,
			ev'ry day I pines for you/no other
			gal will do/All I've got is yours
			for life, my little, my little
			yaller Lou/A week ago dat Lou wid
			anudder nigger flew/took ma money
			too, all I had/She broke ma heart
			in two/when I heard dat she had
			flew/Do you wonder dat I feel so
			bad?/She told me not to cry 'case
			she didn't say good bye/but she'd
			take care of dat red/and nobody
			would get de cash away from
			her/She'd keep her word to me she
			said.

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - NIGHT

The Mau-Mau clan surrounds the television monitor, howling
in disgust.

				BIG BLACK
			He gots to be did.

				1/16TH BLACK
			Did he gots to be.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY

Delacroix is leading the meeting of the staff writers on
Mantan.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			To my astonishment, not only did
			the people in TV land love us, but
			also the critics.
_
										 102.


CLOSE ON DELACROIX

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Mantan was being hailed as
			groundbreaking, barrier breaking,
			also earth shaking.  I looked
			forward to my awards.  Just
			vindication for all my hard work,
			all my talent that had been
			previously overlooked.

INT. THEATER - NIGHT

Delacroix sits in tux amongst many stars.

				ALEC BALDWIN
			The winner for Best New Sitcom is...
			The envelope please...

A starlet hands him the envelope.

				ALEC BALDWIN (CONT'D)
			The winner is... Pierre Delacroix
			for Mantan - The New Millennium
			Minstrel Show!

Delacroix jumps out og his chair and starts sobbing.  Two
ushers have to help him to the stage.  He is overcome with
emotion.  The audience is on their feet with a standing
ovation.  He hugs Alec Baldwin.

				DELACROIX
			Alec Baldwin, this is the very
			first time we've ever met, you
			don't know this, I'm your biggest
			fan and I want you to have my Emmy.
			It's for you, out of the deep
			bowels of my heart - I don't
			deserve this.  You take it.

Alec Baldwin is shocked.  He grabs Delacroix in a bear hug
and they both cry like babies.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			If I did that I'd be assured to
			work forever.  Delacroix the
			grateful Negro.

INT. HOTEL BALLROOM - NIGHT

Delacroix sits at a table in his lucky tux.

				WOODY HARRELSON
			The winner for Best Sit-Com is...

										 103.


Woody opens the envelope.

				WOODY HARRELSON (CONT'D)
			...Pierre Delacroix for Mantan.
			Come on up and get your Golden Globe.

Delacroix jumps out of his seat and sprints.  He gets down
on the stage and starts to breakdance, even spinning on his
head.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			That routine would go over like
			gangbusters.  I would be a dancing
			fool, Hollywood's new favorite
			Negro, move over Danny, Morgan,
			Samuel L., move over Whoopi.

INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY

Delacroix is finishing up the meeting.

				DELACROIX
			I had it all planned.  To the T.

INT. DANCE STUDIO - DAY

Mantan is running rigorous rehearsal of The Pikaninnies.
Over and over, repetition after repetition, Snowflake,
Rastus, Sambo, Nigger Jim, Jungle Bunny and Aunt Jemima try
to do an intricate dance step.

				MANTAN
			I'm tired of you pickaninnies
			messing up my choreography.  It
			goes like this.

Mantan does the step with ease.

				MANTAN (CONT'D)
			Try it again.

The dancers do it once more.

				MANTAN (CONT'D)
			Better.

Cheeba walks in.  Mantan checks him out.

				MANTAN (CONT'D)
			Let's take a ten minute break.

They quickly file past Cheeba without saying a word.  The
rehearsal space is just the two.

										 104.


				CHEEBA
			I'm not drinking the Kool-Aid.

				MANTAN
			What are you talkin' about?

				CHEEBA
			Jim Jones, y'know.  I'm not drinking
			the Kool-Aid.

				MANTAN
			Meaning?

				CHEEBA
			I'm out.

				MANTAN
			Good.  I've got a broken back from
			carrying you all these years anyway.

				CHEEBA
			So that's what you been doing?

				MANTAN
			Damn skippy.

				CHEEBA
			You're in this up till ya neck.

				MANTAN
			Don't shoot me, I'm just the piano
			players.

				CHEEBA
			You can walk away.  We both can.

				MANTAN
			Yeah, that's easy for you to do.
			You never had any talent.

				CHEEBA
			I'm so tired of you running that.
			I always worked hard for you.  You
			think I'm a leech, a kling-on, I
			quit.

Cheeba walks out.

				MANTAN
			I'm the star of Mantan, so you do
			that.  Quit, walk away.  And don't
			come crawling back, either.

										 105.


INT. LIMOUSINE - NIGHT

Mantan and Sloan ride in back.  He's still thinking about
Cheeba.

				SLOAN
			Why don't you call him?

				MANTAN
			For what?  He left.  Not me.

EXT. APOLLO THEATRE - NIGHT

The limo drives past the World Famous Apollo Theatre in
Harlem, a big crowd is in front.

TIGHT ON THEATRE

It READS: MANTAN THE MARVELOUS

INT. DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

It's an unruly, fired up crowd that can be heard all the way
back here.

				SLOAN
			You're sure this is a good idea.

				MANTAN
			My people love me.

He kisses her, she doesn't resist.

				SLOAN
			I love you.

After a long, deep kiss she gently pulls back.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			I'll be down front.  You better
			start putting your face on.

				MANTAN
			Y'know what?

				SLOAN
			What?

				MANTAN
			You look beautiful like that.

INT. APOLLO THEATRE - NIGHT

Sloan takes a seat down front.

										 106.


INT. DRESSING ROOM

Mantan, face already done, puts on the firetruck red lipstick.

INT. APOLLO THEATRE

Sloan is looking around this boisterous crowd when she sees

ON THE MAU-MAU'S

In one of the side boxes.

ON BIG BLACK

He waves to his sister.

ON SLOAN

She knows her brother and his clan are up to no good as the
house lights go black.

ANGLE ON STAGE

Honeycutt walks out on stage.  The audience goes crazy.

				HONEYCUTT
			Thank you so very much.  Show me
			some love.

He laughs.

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			Thank you.  My name is Honeycutt
			and I want to welcome you to a very
			special evening.  It's always great
			coming back to the World Famous
			Apollo Theatre.

The audience applauds.

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			As everybody knows if you can make
			it here on this stage in front of
			the most discriminating audience in
			the world you can make it anywhere.
			Ladies and gentlemen, let's show
			some real Uptown love for Mantan
			The Marvelous!

The curtain goes up and Mantan the Marvelous stands there,
arms raised.  He starts to do his thing.

										 107.


ON MAU-MAU BOX

Led by Big Black, they start shouting insults at Mantan.

ON STAGE

Mantan is a pro, he doesn't stop.  In fact, this makes him
dance harder and harder.

ON SLOAN

She leaves her seat and goes to stop her brother.

ON STAGE

Mantan is moving and grooving.  The unrest in the audience
has picked up.

ON AUDIENCE

They start to "boo."  The tide has turned.  Encouraged, the
Mau-Mau's pick it up another notch.

ON MANTAN

He's human after all, and he does hear the boos.  Don't let
those athletes in the papers fool you.  You hear the boos
and nobody, nobody except Dennis Rodman likes to be booed.
Mantan is getting rattled.

ON MAU-MAU'S BOX

Sloan rushes into the box and they are quiet.  They don't
have to say or shout a thing.  The rough Apollo crowd is
doing it all themselves.

TWO SHOT ON SLOAN AND BIG BLACK

The sister and big brother look at each other.  There is no
love between them.

				SLOAN
			This doesn't change a thing.  I
			will still love him.

Big Black can't believe what he has just heard.

ON STAGE

Now projectiles are raining down upon Mantan.  This has
turned into a RUCKUS, a BROUHAHA, a DONNYBROOK.  Honeycutt
races onto the stage to pull off the still tap dancing
Mantan as the Harlem natives BUMRUSH the stage.  THE WORM
HAS TURNED.

										 108.


ON MAU-MAU'S BOX

Mantan, led by Honeycutt, runs for his life.

ON MOB

They chase him.

ON BACKSTAGE DOOR

Mantan is hauling ass.

EXT. BACKSTAGE

The door crashes open, Mantan rockets out into an open car
door.

ON CAR DOOR

The door slams.

EXT. STREET - NIGHT

The car spins away.

INT. CAR - NIGHT

Delacroix is behind the wheel.  This is the most shaken
we've seen Mantan to date.

				DELACROIX
			Pull ya self together.

Mantan is distraught.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			What are you?  A man or a mouse?
			Are you a punk?  Punking out on me?

				MANTAN
			No.

				DELACROIX
			You getting scared because some
			people don't like what you are doing?

				MANTAN
			Yo, DeLa, they tried to lynch my
			black ass up in dat piece.

										 109.


				DELACROIX
			You've made it from the guttermost
			to the uppermost.  Don't you know
			you should never let them see you
			sweat.  Y'knowwhatI'msayin'?

				MANTAN
			Yeah.

				DELACROIX
			And now is definitely not the time
			to bitch up.

EXT. HARLEM STREET - NIGHT

Delacroix speeds away.

INT. BET STUDIO - NIGHT

Mantan is on the BET show with host TAVIS SMILEY.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			Our guest tonight is the
			extraordinary, talented performer,
			Mantan.  Thanks for coming in.

				MANTAN
			Tavis, thank you for having me.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			Before we begin, I want to thank
			you for coming on my show for your
			first television interview.  You
			could have chosen Mike Wallace,
			Barbara Walters, Jane Pauley,
			whatnot but you're here.

				MANTAN
			I'm more comfortable around my
			people.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			Let's jump right into it.  Your
			show has sparked a world of
			controversy, provoked a tone of
			dialogue.  How do you see all of
			this?

				MANTAN
			Yo, Tavis, check it out.  This is
			the two-one, the 21st century and
			it's all about the money.  Like my
			man Mase says, "it's all about the
			Benjamins."

										 110.


				TAVIS SMILEY
			Money and nothing else?

				MANTAN
			Money makes the world go round.  It
			ain't no joke being poor.  I know
			whatI'mtalkin''bout.
			Y'knowwhatI'msayin'?  I've lived on
			the street.  I've been homeless.
			I've learned how to play the game,
			work the game, be in the game.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			Is it inevitable that the game
			plays you?

				MANTAN
			No if you go with the flow, Tavis.
			That's what a lot of Negroes don't
			understand.  Protesting isn't gonna
			do a damn thing.  If people don't
			like our satire in our number one
			hit show then don't watch it.  Or
			better yet write your own show.  Do
			it better.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			Don't you feel that is a simplistic
			retort?

				MANTAN
			I don't know what a retort is, but
			it's simple.  Mantan - The New
			Millennium Minstrel Show is
			UNIVERSAL.  It's not just for
			Negroes in Compton or 125th in
			Harlem.  This is America.  Our
			ancestors helped build this country,
			we got a right, just like everybody
			else.  I'm not gonna box myself in.
			This show makes people think, and
			they're laughing at the same time.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			I admit, that's a very hard thing
			to do.  Quickly let's go to the
			phones before we pay the bills and
			hear from our proud sponsors, DA
			BOMB.  125% PURE PLEASURE MALT
			LIQUOR.  IT MAKES YOU WANNA GET YA
			FREAK ON AND TIMMI HILLNIGGER.
			125% AUTHENTIC GIT-TOE GEAR WHEN
			YOU WANT TO BE GIT-TOED FABULOUS.
				(MORE)

										 111.


				TAVIS SMILEY (CONT'D)
			Our first caller is Big Black from
			Brooklyn.  Go 'head.

ON MANTAN

				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			Microphone check, one, two.  One,
			two.  Yo Tavis, I be lovin' yo show
			but Mantan you is foul.  Why you
			perpetrating?  You a sellout.

				MANTAN
			That's our opinion.

				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			You're a traitor to the race.  A
			tool for the Caucasoids.

				MANTAN
			Why?  Because I'm successful?
			Because I don't use "Causcasoids"
			as an excuse for not fulfilling my
			dreams?

				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			I ain't hearing all dat noise.  You
			getting played and you don't even
			know it.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			And Big Black from Brooklyn, what
			do you do?

				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			What do I do?

				TAVIS SMILEY
			What do you do?

				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			I'm a revolutionary.

				MANTAN
			That's a job?

				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			That's a full time job, especially
			when sellouts like you are running
			around, acting insane.

				TAVIS SMILEY
			That's enough.

										 112.


				BIG BLACK (O.S.)
			And another thing, you better stay
			away from my sister or you better...

CLICK!!!

				TAVIS SMILEY
			Ladies and gentlemen, there is no
			need to go there.  We can all agree
			to disagree without making threats.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - NIGHT

Sloan turns off the TV.

				DELACROIX
			Why'd you do that?

				SLOAN
			I don't want to hear it.

				DELACROIX
			How long have you and Hambone been
			hangin' out?

				SLOAN
			You're the one that put us together.
			We're friends.

				DELACROIX
			That crazy brother of yours doesn't
			think so.

				SLOAN
			He's just playing big brother.

				DELACROIX
			Oh, is he?  You getting jiggy with
			Mantan?

				SLOAN
			Please don't go there.

				DELACROIX
			Dunwitty and I feel you've been
			getting too close to him, getting
			his mind all messed up.

				SLOAN
			I can't lie to him.  If he asks me
			something, I tell him what I think.

				DELACROIX
			Do you have to be so damn forthright?

										 113.


				SLOAN
			DeLa, you should try it sometime.
			Come into the light.

				DELACROIX
			Light?

				SLOAN
			That which has been hidden in
			darkness is now in the light.  This
			bucket of blood.

				DELACROIX
			You can talk all that mumbo jumbo
			if you want to but your hands are
			much bloody.  I know where I made
			my big mistake.  I have a general
			rule, never get involved
			romantically with somebody crazier
			than you.

CUT TO FLASHBACK

INT. MIDTOWN HOTEL ROOM - DAY

Delacroix and Sloan are taking off their clothes.

				DELACROIX
			This is crazy.

				SLOAN
			That's why it will be so much fun.

They kiss, fall half undressed upon the motel bed.

								  CUT BACK TO:

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - NIGHT

				SLOAN
			That was a mistake, but I don't
			regret it.

				DELACROIX
			The first and only time.  A big
			mistake.  I'm gonna have to ask you
			not to see Mantan anymore.

				SLOAN
			Work related or otherwise?

										 114.


				DELACROIX
			Otherwise.  I trust you know the
			difference.  You're an intelligent
			woman, finished at NYU.

				SLOAN
			DeLa, kiss my big black ass.

				DELACROIX
			And that's how you got me in the
			first place.

Sloan pulls a 3/4 inch cassette out of her bag and hands it
to him.

				SLOAN
			I want you to please view this.  It
			may save your Life.

INT. MANTAN'S APARTMENT - DAY

Mantan and Delacroix are in the middle of a heated discussion.

				DELACROIX
			You shouldn't even be mad at me
			over Sloan.

				MANTAN
			What you did is dead wrong.

				DELACROIX
			Oh, is it?  Buddy boy, in this
			business if people don't produce,
			they get fired.

				MANTAN
			Sloan is the hardest working person
			I've ever met.

				DELACROIX
			Let me ask you a question, if I may.
			How do you think she got the job in
			the first place?  I don't mean to
			burst your bubble, Mantan the
			Marvelous, but Sloan is an
			opportunity.

				MANTAN
			I don't believe it.

				DELACROIX
			Do I have to spell it out for you?
			In fact, go ask Sloan yourself.

										 115.


INT. SLOAN'S STUDIO APARTMENT - DAY

Mantan is grilling Sloan.

				MANTAN
			How did you get this gig?

				SLOAN
			Worked my black ass off, first as
			an intern, then worked my way up to
			this position.

				MANTAN
			You leave something out?

				SLOAN
			After my internship expired, Dela
			was impressed and offered me a
			position as his assistant.

				MANTAN
			And?

				SLOAN
			And what?

				MANTAN
			Stop playing me Sloan.

				SLOAN
			Just ask me what you want to know.

				MANTAN
			Oh, you gonna make me say it.

				SLOAN
			Say what, Manray?

				MANTAN
			Did you ever sleep with DeLa?

				SLOAN
			We did it one time, only once.  It
			had nothing to do with the job, it
			was stupid.  Everything I've got
			I've earned.

				MANTAN
			Aw, c'mon.

				SLOAN
			That's ancient history.  That has
			nothing to do with you and I.

										 116.


				MANTAN
			So you say.  Sloan, you wuz gonna
			use me up just like you used Dela?
			Work it to the top.  I never
			imagined people in this biz could
			flip on you like "IHOP."  I'm damn
			happy DeLa fired ya ass.

				SLOAN
			Forget about me, are you a puppet
			for DeLa?

				MANTAN
			Don't try to change to the subject.

				SLOAN
			Why don't you answer?

				MANTAN
			I know I won't be your puppet.

				SLOAN
			You can go now.

				MANTAN
			I wuz leaving anyway, for good.

INT. RECORDING STUDIO - NIGHT

As usual, the clan is smoking and drinking DA BOMB, a thick
marijuana haze hangs over the studio.

				1/16TH BLACK
			Yo, I got da bomb plan.  We gonna
			hook homeslice Mantan up nicely.

He holds up a floppy disk.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - NIGHT

Delacroix sits behind the desk.  He's bought even more Black
Collectibles, he's surrounded by them.

ON DELACROIX

He dials the phone.

				DELACROIX
			Hello, Mommy, how are you?

										 117.


				ORCHID (O.S.)
			I'm doing okay.  Been reading about
			your show, it's all over everywhere.
			I watched it's all over everywhere.
			I watched it once.  I thought you
			said there would be no buffoonery.

				DELACROIX
			You going to attack me too.  The
			show is a hit.  Aren't you happy
			for me?

INT. ORCHID'S HOUSE

				ORCHID
			Of course I'm happy for you.
			You've worked very hard for your
			success.

				DELACROIX (O.S.)
			Yes I have, very hard.  Has Daddy
			called?

				ORCHID
			No.

ON DELACROIX

				DELACROIX
			Not at all?

				ORCHID (O.S.)
			You know how your Daddy is.

				DELACROIX
			If and when he calls, please don't
			forget to ask him if he's seen
			Mantan.

				ORCHID (O.S.)
			I won't forget.  When are you
			coming up here to see your mother?

				DELACROIX
			Soon.

Delacroix hangs up the phone.  He takes out some change from
his pocket and puts a quarter in the hand of his Jolly
Nigger Bank.

TIGHT ON JNB

Delacroix flips the lever and the quarter flies into the
MOUTH as the EYES roll to the top of its HEAD.

										 118.


Delacroix does this several times.  CLOSEUPS of the BLACK
COLLECTIBLES in the office.

CLOSER ON JNB

Delacroix is staring at the JNB when its MOUTH OPENS, a
quarter flies in and its EYES roll to the top of its HEAD.

ON DELACROIX

He is incredulous.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			When I thought or imagined that my
			favorite Jolly Nigger Bank, an
			inanimate object, a piece of cold,
			cast iron, was moving by itself...

Delacroix slowly, carefully approaches the bank and picks it
off the table.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			...I knew I was getting paranoid.
			Did I really see what I saw or was
			I buggin'?

ON JNB

It's stopped moving.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

Honeycutt is warming up the crazed "Black Face"-wearing
audience.  He points to a YOUNG WHITE MALE, BOBBY

				HONEYCUTT
			Is you a nigga?

				BOBBY
			Hell yeah, I'm a nigga.

The AUDIENCE CHEERS WILDLY.  Honeycutt points to an old
WHITE LADY, LOUISE, a senior citizen.

				HONEYCUTT
			Ma'am, is you a nigga?

				LOUISE
			Yesiree Bob, you darn tootin' I'm a
			nigger.

The AUDIENCE loses it as Honeycutt hugs Louise as if she's a
grandmother.

										 119.


INT. MANTAN'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

Mantan looks up at his makeup laid out before him on the
counter.

TIGHT ON MANTAN

He stares at himself in the dressing room mirror.  Mantan
can't stand to BLACK UP anymore.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

Honeycutt stands next to a young black couple TRE and STACY.

				HONEYCUTT
			Are you a nigger?

				TRE
			Yo!

				HONEYCUTT
			Are you a nigga?

				STACY
			Honeycutt, I'm a really real
			niggress.

Stacy gets a standing ovation.

				HONEYCUTT
			You.  You.  Him.  Her.  We're all
			God's niggas.  Even the lost souls
			who don't know it are niggas cuz
			niggas is a beautiful thing.

INT. BACKSTAGE - NIGHT

As Mantan walks down the hallway WE NOTICE he is not dressed
in his costume and he has no BLACK FACE on.

EXT. SLEEP 'N EAT'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT

A Worker is painting over Sleep 'N Eat's name on the door
and replacing it with HONEYCUTT

				MANTAN
			They don't waste any time, do they?

INT. CONTROL BOOTH - NIGHT

The phone rings next to Delacroix and he answers.

										 120.


				DELACROIX
			Delacroix.  What?!  I'll be right
			down.

Dunwitty looks at him.

INT. BACKSTAGE - NIGHT

Delacroix is met by BUNNING, the STAGE MANAGER.

				BUNNING
			You better talk to him.  He won't
			listen to me.

Delacroix walks over to Mantan who stands in a corner.

				DELACROIX
			Mantan, we got a show to tape.

				MANTAN
			My name is Manray, goddamnit.

				DELACROIX
			Kook and the Gang, it's Manray.
			Let's do the taping.  You go back
			to your dressing room, get dressed
			and blacken up.

				MANRAY
			I'm not playin' myself no mo'.

				DELACROIX
			How you sound?

				MANRAY
			I won't do it anymore.

				DELACROIX
			Manray, I'm very sorry about ya boy
			Cheeba and Sloan.  Believe me, it
			gave me no joy pulling ya coattail
			about her, just lookin' out for a
			brother.  I feel you, all this
			stuff happenin' at once but you
			can't let if affect your work.  You
			gotta be professional.

				MANRAY
			I'm always gonna be that.  But I
			ain't doing no more buck dancing.

				DELACROIX
			No costume.  No blackface.

										 121.


				MANRAY
			No.  No.

Manray leads the way to the stage.

				BUNNING
			I should notify Dunwitty.

				DELACROIX
			And I should put my foot dead up in
			yo' ass.

				BUNNING
			I won't be held responsible.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

Honeycutt stands in front of the drawn curtain.

				HONEYCUTT
			We apologize for the holdup but
			without further delay, ladies and
			gentlemen, boys and girls, let's
			give it up for Mantan.

A THUNDEROUS ROAR FROM THE STUDIO AUDIENCE.

				HONEYCUTT (CONT'D)
			C'mon, don't be niggardly, give it
			up.  Show Mantan some love.

The CURTAIN RISES and MANRAY stands before them in his
regular street clothes and NO BLACK FACE.

ON AUDIENCE

The THUNDEROUS ROAR is CUT OFF LIKE the LIGHTS, LIKE CON
EDISON PULLS THE PLUG WHEN YOU DON'T PAY THE BILL.

INT. CONTROL BOOTH - NIGHT

Dunwitty is HYSTERICAL.

				DUNWITTY
			Stop the tape.  Stop the tape.
			Delacroix.  Get me Delacroix.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

Manray speaks to the silence.
_
										 122.


				MANRAY
			Cousins, I want all of you to go to
			your windows.  Go to your windows
			and yell, scream with all the life
			you can muster up inside your
			assaulted, bruised amd battered
			bodies.

ON MANRAY

				MANRAY
			I'm sick and tired of being a
			nigger and I'm not gonna take it
			anymore.

ON VARIOUS AUDIENCE MEMBERS

Black and white.  Male and female.  Young and old.  All in
black face.

ON MANRAY

He collapses onto the stage and the AUDIENCE sits on their
hands.  Manray gets up and begins to dance.

ON STAGE

Dunwitty runs to Bunning.

				DUNWITTY
			Drop the curtain.  Drop the curtain.

Bunning drops the curtain.  Security rushes onto the stage
and grabs Manray.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			Escort him out the building now!

				MANRAY
			I wasn't finished doing my dance.

				DUNWITTY
			But you are finished.  Done.
			Nigga's like you are a dime a dozen.
			I'm gonna slide Honeycutt right
			into ya spot.  We won't miss a step.
			Get him outta here.

The security guards move Manray as Dunitty glares at
Delacroix.  Honeycutt is all smiles, he's being bumped to
the top.

				DUNWITTY (CONT'D)
			DeLa, I'll deal with you next.

										 123.


EXT. BACKSTAGE

The security guards toss Manray out the stage door.  Manray
looks down the alley and it's empty except for a parked SUV.
He picks himself up and does a joyous dance.  This is
Manray's dance of Freedom.

ON STREET

The Big Black Chevy Suburban creeps down the alley to a
dancing Manray and comes to rest right in front of him.
Manray tries to shield his eyes from the hi-beam headlights.

				MANRAY
			Whaddup?

No one comes out.

				MANRAY (CONT'D)
			Whaddup?

The doors open and the Mau-Mau's file out.

				BIG BLACK
			You truly are a dancing fool.

				1/16TH BLACK
			Yo Black, you looking for trouble.

				MANRAY
			Don't start none, won't be none.

The Mau-Mau's are dying laughing.  Manray tries to walk
through them.  They block him.  Manray attempts to climb
over the suburban.  He's quickly nabbed, give a good ole
Brooklyn Beatdown, then thrown into the rear of the vehicle.

EXT. EMPTY BROOKLYN STREET - NIGHT

The Mau-Mau Mobile rolls up to an abandoned factory.

ON CHEVY SUBURBAN

The Mau-Mau's quickly carry Manray out from the back of the
vehicle into the factory.

INT. FACTORY - NIGHT

Manray sits, feet and hands tied, in the middle of a
cavernous space.  A digital video camera stands on a tripod
in front of him.

				BIG BLACK
			You is one dead nigger.

										 124.


				MANRAY
			What did I do?

				BIG BLACK
			What did you do?

The Mau-Mau's laugh.

				BIG BLACK (CONT'D)
			Brothers, he asks what did he do?

				DOUBLE BLACK
			If you don't know there is nuthin'
			we can do for you.

				BIG BLACK
			Nigga, you will be executed.

ON MANRAY

His face says he can't believe this is happening.

				MANRAY
			For singing and dancing?

				1/16TH BLACK
			You will be done in front of the
			world.

				MO BLACK
			The whole world will be watching.

				1/16TH BLACK
			Via the internet.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			The Mau-Mau's had come up with a
			brilliant, sadistic plan to
			broadcast Mantan's execution LIVE
			over the internet.

				1/16TH BLACK
			We have pirated broadcasting
			facilities.  No way we can be found
			out.  We're in cyberspace.

				JO BLACK
			Nobody will find you till it's too
			late.

MONTAGE

Various newsrooms, computer screens, people running,
shouting, yelling over phones.

										 125.


				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			The Mau-Mau's sent anonymous e-mail
			proclamations to the websites of
			CNN, ABC, MSNBC and CBS.  It was an
			invite to witness the Dance of
			Death, 9 PM, prime time, tomorrow
			night on a site to be designated at
			a later date.

INT. FBI HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT

Delacroix and Cheeba are being interrogated in two adjoining
spaces.  WE ARE seeing them through the two-way mirrors.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			It's no joke getting grilled by the
			FBI for five houts.

Delacroix SCREAMS.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			I don't know anything.

				FBI AGENT
			We know you're involved in this
			abduction.

INT. INTERROGATION ROOM - NIGHT

				CHEEBA
			You know more than me.  Why would I
			do something like that to my best
			friend?  Why?

				FBI AGENT #2
			You tell us.

EXT. FBI HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT

It's a mob scene as the media frenzy heightens.  Delacroix
and Cheeba try to fight their way through the print and
broadcast journalists trying to question them as they leave
FBI headquarters.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			Somehow, someway, somebody had
			tipped the sharks off.  It was a
			feeding frenzy.

Delacroix and Cheeba start pushing people out of the way as
they get in to their waiting car.

										 126.


INT. X-FORCE WAR ROOM - NIGHT

There is a flurry of activity - people man phones, computers
all HI-TECH.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			The X-Force was brought onto the
			case.  When something involves the
			internet, these are the people IBM,
			XEROX, the CIA, FBI, even the US
			Government go to.

ON CLOCK

It reads "T-minus 19 HOURS 22 MINUTES."

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			It was a race against time.  The
			Dance of Death.

INT. CNS STUDIO - NIGHT

Dunwitty is taping a spot.

				DUNWITTY
			Hello, my name is Thomas Dunwitty.
			I'm the Senior V.P. of the
			entertainment division here at CNS.
			I come to you with a heavy heart.

INT. SLOAN'S APARTMENT - CONTINUOUS

She's watching Dunwitty on TV.

				DUNWITTY
			This abduction is a cowardly, vile,
			sinful and dastardly act and I
			promise these creeps will be
			prosecuted to the fullest extent of
			the law.  This is an attack on your
			American way of life...

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT

He's watching the same.

				DUNWITTY
			We here at CNS are offering a
			$100,000 cash award to any
			information that leads to the safe
			return home of our dear friend,
			Mantan.

										 127.


INT. CNS STUDIO

ON DUNWITTY

				DUNWITTY
			Help us and in addition you will
			get a guest-starring speaking role
			on the next Mantan - The New
			Millennium Minstrel Show, plus an
			added bonus: a lifetime of Da Bomb
			125% Malt Liquor.  Let's you get ya
			"freak on", as well as a full
			wardrobe of Timmi Hillnigger Active
			Git Toe Wear.  Mantan, may God
			bless you...

INT. X-FORCE HEADQUARTERS - DAY

Delacroix and Sloan hurry to stay with BARNETT, he's the
commander of the X-Force.

				BARNETT
			Let's go, time's wasting.

INT. X-FORCE WAR ROOM

They follow Barnett into the war room.

				BARNETT
			They sent the notice out on an
			anonymous remailer.

				SLOAN
			A what?

				BARNETT
			It's used to mask the origin of an
			email, also the computer from which
			it's sent.

				DELACROIX
			There oughta be a law...

				BARNETT
			Not yet, anyway, it's legal.  We
			will find the source where it's
			being broadcasted and hosted.
			We'll get the people that
			bushwhacked Mantan.

				SLOAN
			Before Manray is dead?

										 128.


				BARNETT
			I can't answer that.

ON CLOCK

It reads "6 HOURS 16 MINUTES."

MONTAGE

Police squads, SWAT Teams are busting into the wrong homes,
apartments, projects, hi-tech computer labs looking for the
Mau-Mau's.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			SWAT teams all up and down the East
			Coast busted in on known dissidents
			looking for Manray.  All the tips
			called in, info gathered through
			surveillance proved for naught.

INT. X-FORCE WAR ROOM

				BARNETT
			The both of you should go home.  We
			will keep you abreast.

				SLOAN
			This is looking like a needle in a
			haystack.  It's hopeless.

Delacroix holds Sloan as he leads her out.  She is having
difficulty breathing with her asthma.

				DELACROIX
			Thank you for your help.

				BARNETT
			The X-Force always gets their man.

INT. DELACROIX'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

He sits in front of his GIANT SCREEN, on the desk in front
of him is the 3/4 inch cassette Sloan gave him.  He picks it
up and turns it on.

				DELACROIX (V.O.)
			It was ten o'clock and the Dance of
			Death was about to commence.

										 129.


ON MONITOR

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Since a lot of people still didn't
			have computers, the networks sought
			a court order to carry it live,
			taking the feed off the internet.
			It was granted.  A life snuff
			broadcast right into your living
			room.

ON DELACROIX

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			I had to give it to the Mau-Mau',
			they definitely had a sense of
			irony.  They chose www.nigger.com
			as the website to pirate.

INT. FACTORY - NIGHT

The Mau-Mau's ironically wear WHITE MASKS, they stand behind
the tied-up Mantan.  A device alters their voices.

				BIG BLACK
			We are LIVE on the cyberspace.
			Whereas Mantan is a TOM...

				BLACK BLACK
			Whereas Mantan is a disgrace...

				SMOOTH BLACK
			Whereas Mantan is a head-scratching,
			foot-shuffling Negro...

				1/16TH BLACK
			Whereas, whereas, where's the ass?

The Mau-Mau's laugh.

				BIG BLACK
			Whereas Mantan the dancing fool,
			you are condemned to death.

				JO BLACK
			The Dance of Death.

1/16th Black unties Manray.

MONTAGE

WE SEE DELACROIX, SLOAN, CHEEBA WITH LOURDESE, DUNWITTY,
JUNEBUG AND DOT, ORCHID, THE X-FORCE WATCHING THIS SPECTACLE
ON COMPUTERS OR TV SCREENS.

										 130.


ON COMPUTER SCREEN

We see a CARTOON, Yosemite Sam is shooting at the feet of
Bugs Bunny with his six-shooter in each hand.  Bugs Bunny is
doing a fast dance, dodging bullets.

ON MONITOR

The Mau-Mau's shoot at the feet of Manray.

				BIG BLACK
			Dance nigger.

Manray taps.

				SMOOTH BLACK
			You got anything to say for yourself?

				MANRAY
			If you're gonna kill me, kill me.

				SMOOTH BLACK
			Don't worry.

INT. SLOAN'S APARTMENT - CONTINUOUS

She is having an asthma attack, it was brought on by the
proceedings.  Sloan uses her inhaler.

INT. FACTORY - NIGHT

Each Mau-Mau has a 9mm and is firing it at the feet of
Manray.  They scream "Faster!" and "Dance!" Manray is
hoofing.  He's never tapped this fast, at this breakneck
pace, ever.  But it's evident his dance is one of defiance.
He's not dancing to stay alive.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS

He screams at the monitor.

				DELACROIX
			Don't dance.  Don't do it.

INT. FACTORY

The Mau-Mau's have noticed Manray's strong will, his pride
and they don't like it.  They shoot even more at his feet.

				BIG BLACK
			You ain't Blak.

				DOUBLE BLACK
			Blak you ain't.

										 131.


				SMOOTH BLACK
			You a Oreo.  Not Blak.  Not BLAK.

The Mau-Mau's start to chant, "Blak, blak, blak."

INT. SLOAN'S APARTMENT

She hears this and quickly picks up the phone to call the
authorities.

INT. FACTORY

				MANRAY
			There is nothing you can do to me.
			I'm wearing the taps of Bill
			"Bojangles" Robinson.

Manray is shot in one foot.  Then the other.

				BIG BLACK
			Let's seeya dance now, Mr. Bojangles.

Manray somehow manages to right himself and starts to dance
again.  The Mau-Mau's can't believe it.

ON MANRAY

He dances like his life depends on it.  Despite the fact his
feet are a bloody mess.

				BIG BLACK (CONT'D)
			You ain' BLAK.

He shoots Manray in the chest, the Mau-Mau's follow him and
he does a spastic last jig as the 9mm bullets riddle his
twitching body.

ON TV SCREEN

It goes black.

MONTAGE

Helicopters fly through the night sky.  Cop cars and trucks,
SWAT team vehicles are on the move.  SIRENS BLARE.

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE

Delacroix's head is on his desk.  He has been crying.  On
cue the Black Collectibles start to move.  The Jolly Nigger
Bank, Aunt Jemima's, Mammies, etc., they are animated for
REAL.

										 132.


ON DELACROIX

His head pops up as he sees the objects.  He too is in
BLACKFACE.  In a rage, he starts to throw them against the
wall.

				DELACROIX
			Leave me alone.  Get away from me.
			You spearchucker.  You black sambo.
			You nigger pickaninny.  Fat Mammie.

Delacroix has finally lost it.  He looks at the shambles
he's made of his office.

EXT. FACTORY - CONTINUOUS

The Mau-Mau's come out of the factory high as a kite.  Each
has a big fat joint or a 64 oz. of DA BOMB.  They're also
doing a free-style rap about their execution.

ON CHEVY SUBURBAN

They get in when the squak of police walkie-talkie's clicks.

				BIG BLACK
			It's the man!

What follows is a horrifying display of firepower.  All the
Mau-Mau's bodies are doing the Bonnie and Clyde Sonny
Corleone Dance of Death as bullets tear into them and the
Suburban.  Not one of them is able to get a shot off.  The
shooting stops.  The twitching stops.  All's quiet.  1/16th
Black comes out with his hands up.

				1/16TH BLACK
			Don't shoot!  Don't shoot!  I've
			been held hostage.  They made me
			part of them against my own free
			will.  Don't shoot!

The cops quickly pounce on 1/16th Black.

				1/16TH BLACK (CONT'D)
			I'm WHITE.  I'm WHITE!  Look at me,
			I'm white!

INT. DELACROIX'S OFFICE

Delacroix is on the floor when the doorknob turns.  It's
Sloan and she has a gun in one hand and her inhaler in the
other.  She's wheezing like mad.

				SLOAN
			Get up and put that tape in.

										 133.


She points the gun at his head.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Do what I say.

Delacroix takes the cassette tape off his desk and puts it
in the 3/4 inch desk.

				SLOAN (CONT'D)
			Don't make me have to use this.

				DELACROIX
			I didn't think this was in your
			studies at NYU.

Delacroix hits the PLAY button.

ON SCREEN

IMAGES.  HISTORY.  VISUALS.  Sloan has put together a tape
of the worst, most racist, stereotypical images from cinema
and TV over the last 100 years.  With these images there's
also a laugh-track.

				SLOAN
			Watch this.  This is what you
			contributed to.  Because of you,
			Manray is dead.  Mu brother's dead.
			It's all because of you.

Delacroix can't watch the monitor.

				DELACROIX
			I'm sorry.  I didn't know anyone
			would get hurt.  I'm sorry, please
			give me that gun before you hurt
			yourself.  Give me the gun.

He reaches for it.  BOOM!  Sloan screams.

				SLOAN
			I told you but you wouldn't listen.
			You never listened to me.

				DELACROIX
			Give me the gun.

She reluctantly hands it to him.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			Go, get out of here.  Go home.

Sloan runs out.  Delacroix slumps to the floor, WIPES HER
FINGERPRINTS off the revolver.

										 134.


ON DELACROIX

He looks at the monitor, the tape still playing.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			As I bled to death, as my very
			precious life oozed out of me all I
			could think of was that I never
			made my father proud.  My mother
			didn't count.

ON SCREEN

We see STEP 'N FETCHIT, MANTAN MORELAND and WILLIE BEST.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Everything I did, no matter how
			great or small, was always
			extraordinary to her.  With Daddy
			it was a different ball game.  He
			never saw me.  Pierre Delacroix.

ON DELACROIX

A pool of blood has formed around his dying body.

				DELACROIX (V.O.) (CONT'D)
			Now it was time to buy the farm,
			for me to meet my maker.  Goodbye
			cousins, and please tune in next
			week for the Best of Mantan - The
			New Millennium Minstrel Show.

ON SCREEN

We see MANTAN in BLACKFACE doing his BUCKDANCE

CLOSE ON DELACROIX

He looks at Mantan.

				DELACROIX (CONT'D)
			For the love of Joseph and Mary,
			what have I done?  My God, what
			have I done?!

Delacroix slumps over dead.

								  CUT TO:

										 135.


ARCHIVAL FOOTAGE OF MALCOLM X

				MALCOLM X
			You've been had.  You've been took.
			You've been led astray.  Run amok.
			You've been bamboozled.

								  FADE TO BLACK.

THE END.

END CREDITS.