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The Band Stand Monologue

The Band Stand by David Lily
Character: Jack
Gender: Male
Age (range): 20s
Style: Comedy
Length: 3 minutes


Background Info: Jack was just offered to sing lead in a band with an old fling of his, Melissa. He'd love to, if only music history wasn't so apparent.

I'd love to sing lead along side of you in your band! But, I do have some concerns. It's not about you and the fact that we dated... briefly, or about Simon, or even Eddie, believe it or not. It's about me. I know you think everything I say is about me, but this time it's... really about me.

I can't join your band. On the surface, it seems like the most amazing offer. And I'm sure John Oates - of Hall & Oates fame - was floored when Daryl Hall asked him to "form a band" together. In retrospect, if John Oates was at all concerned with his future, he should have turned down the offer and found someone he could have called to form a band with.

Look, all throughout music history, there's always one guy in the group who ends up looking foolish. And it's always the guy who was asked by the other one to form the band. Art Garfunkel, of Simon and Garfunkel, perfect example... The Captain, from Captain and Tennille... The entire gang, from Kool and the Gang. The list goes on and on.

I'm sorry, Melissa, you're an extremely beautiful and talented girl. But I can't allow myself to turn into John Oates.