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Boiler Room Monologue

The Boiler Room by Ben Young
Character: Jim
Gender: Male
Age (range): 18 - 55
Style: Drama
Length: 5 minutes


Jim: We don't hire brokers here, we train new ones. That's it Skippy - pack your sh!t, let's go. Okay, here's the deal, I'm not here to waste your time. Okay, I certainly hope you're not here to waste mine, so I'm gonna keep this short. Become an employee of this firm, you will make your first million within 3 years. Okay, I'm gonna repeat that, you will make a million dollars, within three years of your first day of employment at J.T. Marlin. There's no question as to whether you become a millionaire working here. The only question is, how many times over. You think I'm joking....I am not joking. I am a millionaire. It's a weird thing to hear, right? Lemme tell ya, its a weird thing to say: I am a f#@king millionaire. And guess how old I am...27, you know what that makes me here? A f#@king senior citizen. This firm is entirely comprised of people your age, not mine. Lucky for me, I happen to be very f#@king good at my job or I'd be out of one. You guys are the new blood. You are the future swinging d!cks of this firm. Now you all look money hungry and that's good. Anybody who tells you that money is the root of all evil, doesn't f#@king have any. They say money can't buy happiness. Look at the f#@king smile on my face! Ear to ear baby! You want details, fine. I drive a Ferrari 355 Cabriolet. What's up? I have a ridiculous house at the South Fork. I have every toy you could possibly imagine. And best of all, I am liquid. So now you know what's possible, let me tell you what's required. You are required to work your f#@king ass off at this firm. We want winners here, not pikers. A piker walks at the bell. A Piker asks how much vacation time you get in the first year. Vacation time? People come to work at this firm for one reason, to become filthy rich, that's it. We're not here to make friends, we're not saving the f#@king manatees here guys. You want vacation time, go teach third grade at a public school.
Okay, first three months at the firm are as a trainee, you'll make 150 dollars a week. After you've done training, you take the series seven, you pass that, you become a junior broker and you're opening accounts for your team leader. You open forty accounts you start working for yourself, the sky's the limit. A word or two about being a trainee, your friends, parents, other brokers, they're gonna give you sh!t about it, it's true, a 150 a week, that's not a lot of money. Pay them no mind. You need to learn this business and this is the time to to do it.
Once you pass the test, none of that's gonna matter. Your friends are sh!t. You tell em you made 25 grand last month they're not gonna f#@king believe you. F#@k them! F#@k 'em! Parents don't like the life you lead. F#@k your mom and dad. See how it feels when you're making their f#@king Lexus payments. Now go home and think about it. Think about whether or not this is really for you. If you decide that it isn't, listen, it's nothing to be embarrassed about. This is not for everyone. But if you really want this, you call me on Monday and we'll talk. Just don't waste my f#@king time......Okay, that's it.